IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that men and women have different qualities. Therefore, some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that
men
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 and
women
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 are better suited for certain jobs
due to
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 their inherent traits has been a topic of debate for many years.
While
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 biological differences exist, I strongly oppose the idea that these should define
job
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 suitability. In today’s world, where equality and fairness are highly valued,
such
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 outdated assumptions about
gender
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 only serve to hinder societal progress. The argument that
men
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 and
women
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 are naturally suited to different roles is largely based on stereotypes rather than reality. Traditionally,
men
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 have been linked to physical strength and leadership, leading to the assumption that they are more suitable for jobs like construction or managerial roles.
On the other hand
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,
women
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 are often seen as nurturing, which has reinforced the belief that they are better suited for teaching or caregiving positions.
However
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, these generalizations fail to reflect the diversity of skills within each
gender
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.
Women
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 can excel in physically demanding or technical fields, just as
men
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 can succeed in roles requiring empathy or communication. Limiting
job
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 opportunities based on
gender
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 disregards individual talents and potential.
Furthermore
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, the growing presence of
women
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 in male-dominated industries
such
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 as engineering,
as well as
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men
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 entering fields like nursing, demonstrates that
gender
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 does not determine
job
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 suitability. When people are assessed based on their abilities and interests rather than their
gender
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, they can perform exceptionally well in any profession.
This
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 shift challenges outdated notions and highlights the importance of focusing on merit. In conclusion, the idea that certain jobs are more appropriate for
men
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 or
women
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 is outdated and does not take into account individual strengths and preferences. By rejecting
gender
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 stereotypes and prioritizing skills and qualifications, society can ensure equal opportunities for all. For these reasons, I firmly disagree with the idea that
gender
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 should dictate
job
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 suitability.

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention specific studies or statistics that support your points about gender in the workplace.
coherence and cohesion
Although the structure is clear, adding transitional phrases between some paragraphs could enhance the flow of your argument and improve cohesion.
task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the topic with a clear stance against gender stereotypes in job suitability. This is a strong and relevant response to the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well constructed, providing a solid framework for your argument and reinforcing your position clearly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • inherent qualities
  • social dynamics
  • merit-based selection
  • advancements in technology
  • levelled the playing field
  • gender stereotypes
  • equal opportunities
  • physical differences
  • workplace
  • evolving
  • traditional view
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