Some people believe that younger generations can learn a lot about how to be good members of society from older generations. Others think it is better for younger people to get advice on how to be a good citizen from their peers. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Certain
people
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consider that elders should teach children how to be good
member
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members
show examples
of
society
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,
thus
Linking Words
they can pass a lot of
valuabe
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valuable
knowledge to the youngsters.
However
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, others believe that young
people
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will gain more skills of good
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citizen
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citizens
show examples
from the children same age as them. I
thin
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think
show examples
that both points of view are valid.
This
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eassy
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essay
easy
will present my viewpoint and discuss relevant
agruments
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arguments
.
Firstly
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, older
genereations
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generations
generation
went through a lot of
happenigs
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happenings
happening
important to the country's history,
due to
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that they have a
resamble
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resemble
expirence
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experience
as
a
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apply
show examples
citizens
Correct the article-noun agreement
citizen
show examples
. Taking,
generation
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the generation
show examples
of my grandparents as an example, they have seen and participated in the war.
Me as
Correct pronoun usage
As
show examples
young
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a young
show examples
person, I have been living in a free and
peacefull
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peaceful
country
through
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apply
show examples
my whole life,
thus
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only my
old
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older
show examples
family
member
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members
show examples
can teach me how to behave during
war
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the war
show examples
.
Moreover
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, they can present
my
Correct pronoun usage
me
show examples
how a good
citizen
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would act during events significant for my country.
On the other hand
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, my
peers
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have knowledge of the modern
society
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. Nowadays,
people
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can do many
paper work
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paperwork
show examples
,
such
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as paying taxes or bills online. My friends were the ones to show me how to deal with
electronics
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electronic
show examples
systems,
that
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which
show examples
every good
citizen
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should know.
Moreover
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,
acording
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according
to official
surverys
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surveys
survey
conducted by
EU
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the EU
show examples
,
significant
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a significant
show examples
part of seniors do not have
skills
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the skills
show examples
allowing them to use computers,
thus
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they can not show youngsters how to be
parto
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part
of modern
society
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. Concluding, only
peers
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can teach each
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
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duties
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the duties
show examples
of
good
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a good
show examples
citizen
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in the present.
To sum up
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, I believe that both opinions presented in the
introdution
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introduction
are valid. Both elders and
peers
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are able to
tech
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teach
show examples
young
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the young
show examples
generation how to
be act
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act
show examples
as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
Use synonyms
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
. Seniors can show and explain skills
taht
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that
they gain through their long life. Young
people
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can present their
peers
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to
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with
show examples
modern
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society
Replace the word
societal
show examples
issues.

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grammar
There are some minor grammatical errors and spelling mistakes that affect clarity (e.g., 'valuabe' should be 'valuable', 'resamble' should be 'resemble'). It is important to proofread your essay to eliminate these errors.
development
Try to develop your arguments more fully. Some points are presented, but they could benefit from further explanation and examples to strengthen your position.
structure
Ensure you have a clear thesis statement in your introduction that encapsulates your main argument. This helps guide the reader through your essay.
content
You have provided a balanced view of both perspectives, which is essential in a discussion essay. Your ability to address both sides of the argument is commendable.
examples
You have included personal examples from your own life, which adds relatability and supports your points effectively.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealth of experience
  • historical context
  • ethical guidance
  • life skills
  • contemporary issues
  • relatable experiences
  • societal norms
  • traditional values
  • societal cohesion
  • innovative views
  • progressive views
  • intergenerational learning
  • mutual respect
  • camaraderie
  • societal unity
  • individualistic societies
  • bridging the gap
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