Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There has been much
disscussion
Correct your spelling
discussion
revolving around the issue of whether
children
Use synonyms
should
be stay
Change the verb form
stay
show examples
at
home
Use synonyms
untill
Correct your spelling
until
they
would be
Verb problem
are
show examples
over seven
aged
Verb problem
years old
show examples
or must
be attend
Change the verb form
attend
show examples
a school classes
Correct the article-noun agreement
school classes
a school class
show examples
before
this
Linking Words
age
Use synonyms
. I totally agree that for protection
porpuses
Correct your spelling
purposes
show examples
,
children
Use synonyms
must
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
stay at
home
Use synonyms
untill
Correct your spelling
until
they are
eghit
Correct your spelling
eight
years old. On the
first
Correct word choice
other
show examples
side,
children
Use synonyms
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early
age
Use synonyms
did not have the ability to protect themselves.
this
Linking Words
can be seen obviously when any small risk
face
Change the verb form
faces
show examples
them.
For example
Linking Words
, when
children
Use synonyms
face
a dogs
Correct the article-noun agreement
dogs
a dog
show examples
or any other animal they would be
afiar
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afraid
and try to
scape
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escape
show examples
. As
result
Add an article
a result
show examples
of that,
this
Linking Words
dengerous setuation
Correct your spelling
dangerous situation
can harm them and leave them with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
serois
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serious
injures
Replace the word
injuries
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
,
leave
Wrong verb form
leaving
show examples
homes
Fix the agreement mistake
home
show examples
at
early
Add an article
an early
show examples
age
Use synonyms
for
children
Use synonyms
can cause
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many diseases.
Children
Use synonyms
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early
age
Use synonyms
did not have good
recougnation
Correct your spelling
recognition
of the
nagetive
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negative
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
. For
instence
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instance
,
childrens
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children
show examples
can
easly
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easily
eat junky food
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
they are not well known for
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
negative impacts
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
bodies
Change noun form
body's
bodies'
show examples
health.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, staying at
home
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for
children
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can have many
advantuges
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advantages
.
children
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who spend most of their time
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Use synonyms
with their parents might have
a better educational opportunities
Correct the article-noun agreement
better educational opportunities
a better educational opportunity
show examples
. Their
parants
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parents
can educate them and teach them not only the main
school's
Change noun form
school
show examples
subjects but
also
Linking Words
other useful skills for their future life.
Additionly
Replace the word
In addition
show examples
,
ealry
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early
aged
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
children
Use synonyms
can have
a good manors
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good manor
good manors
show examples
while
Linking Words
they
stay
Verb problem
spend
show examples
a lot with
thier
Correct your spelling
their
parents at
home
Use synonyms
.
by
Change preposition
In
show examples
this
Linking Words
way, they would not be
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
able to
involve
Replace the word
involved
show examples
with other
children
Use synonyms
who are not well
manored
Correct your spelling
mannered
. As
consequence
Add an article
a consequence
show examples
of that, they would have a good
personalty
Correct your spelling
personality
show examples
and great
manor
Correct your spelling
manners
show examples
which will
obtained
Change the verb form
obtain
show examples
them a good social stage. In conclusion, it is a
contraversal
Correct your spelling
controversial
matter
that
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
children
Use synonyms
should
be stay
Change the verb form
stay
show examples
at
home
Use synonyms
untill
Correct your spelling
until
they reach over seven or should be allowed to attend
a school classes
Correct the article-noun agreement
school classes
a school class
show examples
before
this
Linking Words
age
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, I believe that early
aged
Replace the word
age
show examples
children
Use synonyms
must
be stayed
Change to the active voice
stay
have stayed
show examples
at
home
Use synonyms
to protect them from external risks.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state both sides of the argument in the introduction. It is also important to outline your own opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Check your sentences for logical flow and make sure each point relates back to the main argument. Use linking words such as 'however', 'on the other hand', and 'for example' to improve coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with spelling and grammar; practice writing simple sentences correctly. This will help your ideas to be understood more clearly.
task achievement
You provide clear reasons and examples to support your arguments about the safety of children staying at home.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional development
  • cognitive development
  • secure attachments
  • imaginative play
  • problem-solving skills
  • creativity
  • structured environment
  • academic readiness
  • language skills
  • social interaction
  • anxiety
  • diverse social settings
  • social skills
  • play-based curriculum
  • independence
  • working parents
  • educational setting
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