IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport construction. Some people say that the government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. Do you agree or disagree

In today’s era, humans are very busy in their lives, so people need to take
flights
Use synonyms
 in everyday life, which causes air traffic.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
,
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
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 rate is increasing, and it is affecting our environment.
Moreover
Linking Words
, airlines are charging more from customers if the government increases tax,
then
Linking Words
 it will be more expensive for the buyers.
While
Linking Words
 I believe the government should not increase
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
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 on
flights
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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 with, if we need a stable economy,
flights
Use synonyms
 are very useful for long
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
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. It can be included in public
transport
Use synonyms
instead
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 of using private vehicles. We have to promote public
transport
Use synonyms
 for long journeys like more than in a car.
Flights
Use synonyms
 are useful, so we can avoid public
transport
Use synonyms
.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, citizens’ life can be easy and stable.
Moreover
Linking Words
, we can save time with the
using
Replace the word
use
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 of planes, as we can reach faster to the destination.
For example
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, if we are
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 from Toronto to Edmonton, it
is taking
Wrong verb form
takes
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 three days
in
Change preposition
by
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car
Add an article
the car
a car
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, but via
Change the spelling
aeroplane
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airplane
Add a comma
airplane,
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 we can reach in 4 hours.
On the other hand
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, if
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 increase
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
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,
then
Linking Words
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
has to
Verb problem
will
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 struggle, and airports will be closed. If tickets are expensive,
then
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 people will choose another way of travel. As
result
Add an article
a result
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 of
this
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, we will see more traffic on
road
Correct article usage
the road
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, and it can be caused more accidents.
Furthermore
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, we can see
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
 increase in pollution
due to
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 cars.
For instance
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, developed countries like
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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, Canada, USA are using
flights
Use synonyms
 as common transportation, and countries like India and China,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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are using
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 as luxury
transport
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, we can say that using
flights
Use synonyms
 should be common as we are using buses and trains. It can help
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
 our economy significantly as well.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure all your main ideas are clear and focus on the topic. Each paragraph should connect to your main point.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of your ideas between paragraphs. Transition words could help.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion about the topic and express it well.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion provide a good overview of your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • air traffic
  • noise pollution
  • air pollution
  • airport construction
  • environmental damage
  • natural habitats
  • taxing
  • discourage
  • unnecessary travel
  • impact on the environment
  • government taxation
  • promote sustainable alternatives
  • public transportation infrastructure
  • reduce the demand
  • funding initiatives
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