Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of good. Other argue that customers should avoid buying good with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is an ongoing debate over the
responsibility
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of manufacturers and supermarkets for the production phase.
While
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some individuals claim that reducing the amount of packaged items
responsibility
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goes to
producers
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and distributors because they are the starters of the process, others believe that buyers should not buy products with a lot of packaging to send a message to the
producers
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.
This
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essay will explore both views before presenting a personal opinion. On one side of the argument, there are some conditions that
producers
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and distributors should be aware of for environmental conditions during the supply and packaging process. One of the main problems is a waste issue,
producers
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create many products with a lot of packaging to attract
customers
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.
For instance
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, the brand is known as Zara, which provides a lot of unnecessary packaging just only get more
customers
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.
Therefore
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, trees are being cut down for box production, and
then
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the loss of many areas for animals started to
loss
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lose
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because of the usage of boxes.
On the other hand
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, those who argue that
customers
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should step out and limit purchasing goods to reduce the amount. They have the power to reduce purchasing, and by doing so, they can signal to companies that they want eco-friendly opinions.
For instance
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, in supermarkets, people refuse to get plastic bags to raise awareness about protecting the environment.
Thus
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,
this
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kind of reaction coming from
customers
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has a strong effect on reducing unnecessary packaging. In conclusion, whether reducing packaging waste relies on the creators of the items or the seller,
either
Correct word choice
apply
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this
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task
responsibility
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of the consumers
for providing
Change preposition
to provide
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a healthier environment.
This
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is a multifaceted issue that necessitates collaboration between all stakeholders involved in the supply chain.
While
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both views have merit, I believe that
responsibility
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should be shared between manufacturers/supermarkets and consumers. A balanced approach is needed for effective action.

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coherence and cohesion
Your essay would benefit from clearer topic sentences in each paragraph. This helps the reader understand the main idea of each section.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to link your ideas smoothly. Words like 'however,' 'furthermore,' and 'in addition' can help connect your thoughts better.
task achievement
You presented both views of the argument well and showed a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturers
  • supermarkets
  • packaging
  • responsibility
  • reduce
  • amount
  • customers
  • avoid
  • buying
  • products
  • waste
  • environment
  • eco-friendly
  • biodegradable
  • options
  • together
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