In some cultures, childrens are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

There is no denying the fact that in some cultures, kids are often told that they can achieve anything they want if they try hard enough. There are both advantages and
disadvantages
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of
this
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situation.
This
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essay will analyze
this
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topic from both points of view. On the one hand, one major advantage of saying to
children
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that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough is making them more ambitious and creative in doing things they want to achieve. Another advantage is that
children
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will try to do their best to achieve what they want.
For example
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, if a mother told her
child
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that she would buy a gift for him if he got a full mark in a math test, he would study very hard to have the full mark.
On the other hand
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, the
disadvantages
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may include if the
child
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tries very hard and does not achieve what he wants , he might think that his parents are lying to him
then
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he will lose the trust of his parents .
In addition
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to that, giving
this
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message to
children
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may lead them to do dangerous things.
For example
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, if a
child
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wants to fly like a bird, he will try hard to fly , but
this
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is impossible,
as a result
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, his legs or arms might be broken.
To sum up
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, there are lots of advantages and
disadvantages
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of saying to
children
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that they can achieve anything they want by trying hard. The advantages may include making the
child
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more creative ,
while
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the
disadvantages
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include losing the trust of the
child
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’s parents.

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task achievement
Make sure to explain your points in more detail. Adding more examples can help support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the structure of your essay. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea.
task achievement
You introduced the topic clearly and addressed both the advantages and disadvantages.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inspiration
  • motivation
  • work ethic
  • resilience
  • self-confidence
  • self-worth
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • frustration
  • self-esteem
  • pressure
  • anxiety
  • individual effort
  • collaboration
  • social support
  • systemic factors
  • talent
  • opportunity
  • luck
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