Some toddlers are using mobile phones for hours each day. WHy is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays,

Correct article usage

the

show examples

usage of phones

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

increased among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children,

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

between five to eight

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

olds

Correct your spelling

old

show examples

Also

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

wants

Change the verb form

want

show examples

their

toddler

Fix the agreement mistake

toddlers

show examples

get

Verb problem

show examples

entertained in many ways.

Besides

Linking Words

the leisure activities on

phone

Correct article usage

the phone

show examples

Parents

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

introduce their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

Correct article usage

the internte

show examples

internte

Correct your spelling

Internet

whcih

Correct your spelling

which

can

provide

Verb problem

have

show examples

massive

Add an article

a massive

show examples

positive impact on their

childs

Change to a genitive case

child's

show examples

brain.

To begin

Linking Words

with, in many cases and generally in western countries, both the

parents

Use synonyms

do jobs, they are always busy in their work,

however

Linking Words

, at the same time they

also

Linking Words

have to take care of their child,

therefore

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

only get little time to do household duties

such

Linking Words

as cleaning and cooking.

Linking Words

FOr

Correct your spelling

For

show examples

example, my aunt always

handover

Correct your spelling

handed over

show examples

a tablet as a phone to my little brother

while

Linking Words

she is preparing a meal or

dong

Correct your spelling

doing

show examples

laundry.

Moreover

Linking Words

, toddlers

also

Linking Words

require

Wrong verb form

required

show examples

to engage with the new developments around the world.

Secondly

Linking Words

, there are many coaching

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

, where, children are asked to bring their own tablet or an

ipad

Correct your spelling

iPad

to learn modern math techniques through

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educational apps.

For instance

Linking Words

couple

Change the article

a couple

show examples

of years ago there was a pandemic around the world,

the

Correct word choice

and the

show examples

government

decide

Wrong verb form

decided

show examples

shutdown

Correct your spelling

shut down

show examples

all public places, including schools.

However

Linking Words

, schools started

online

Add an article

the online

an online

show examples

study. Since

then

Linking Words

, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

parents

Use synonyms

are

Wrong verb form

have been

show examples

in favour of introducing phones at an early age of their child.

As it

Correct word choice

show examples

benfits

Correct your spelling

benefits

befits

their

childs

Change to a genitive case

child's

show examples

learning skills and

also

Linking Words

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

their general knowledge through watching educational

youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

videos.

To sum up

Linking Words

, in the present

scenatio

Correct your spelling

scenario

early

Correct article usage

the early

show examples

introduction of phones to toddlers has

became

Change the verb form

become

show examples

very common and

usefull

Correct your spelling

useful

at the

sametime

Correct your spelling

same time

. After school, children deserve some entertainment for their skill development.

pp7312326Fri May 30 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Make sure your introduction clearly states your main point about whether this trend is positive or negative. This will help guide your essay more effectively.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph to improve your logical structure. This makes it easier for the reader to follow your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Try to combine similar ideas together to avoid repetition and strengthen each point you make. This will make your arguments more convincing.

general advice

Make sure to proofread your work for spelling and grammatical errors, as these can distract the reader and reduce the overall quality of your essay.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples that help to explain your points, like the example about the pandemic and online learning.

task achievement

You addressed the topic well by discussing both the reasons for phone usage and its potential benefits.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
As the demand for oil and gas continues to rise, there is a growing need to explore these energy sources in remote locations. Do you believe the benefits of exploiting these areas outweigh the drawbacks of causing environmental damage? 4.5
It is argued that more remote areas should be exploited to explore deposits of oil and gas as the demand for these energy sources is constantly growing. Although the exploration can be done easily as the locations are not yet developed, I believe that the drawback of destroying the natural habitats of wildlife outweighs the benefits.
7.5
band
Some people says we should use free space in town and city for plantation a d some says that it should be used for construction. Do you agree or disagree?
Globally, many cities are facing a social debate on how to use the remaining free space. While some prefer green spaces, many people also opt for new infrastructure or skyscrapers. In my personal view, I prefer to transform the unused land into parks or gardens, as I believe that they would benefit the public more.
8
band
Five months ago, you started renting an apartment on a six-month agreement. You now wish to stay in the apartment for longer than the six months you originally agreed with the owner. Write a letter to the owner of your apartment. In your letter • say how long you now want to rent the apartment for • explain why your plans have changed • tell the owner about a problem in the apartment
I am writing you this letter to let you know that I would like to stay in the apartment for another 6 months. I wanted to buy my family house as planned, but due to financial issues, I can not afford it right now. I really like this place, therefore, I don't want to look for another residence to rent. Besides, this location is near my workplace which is a great advantage since I don't have to take the bus.
6
band
Some people believe that family is more important than friends. To what extent do you agree and disagree?
It has been significant debates about choosing between friends and family. In recent times choosing family over friends has created a major impact on society. In my opinion, family plays a very important role but they are also a strength of any person’s life.
7.5
band
Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.
Many believe that studying about events of the past is a vital lesson area. Whilst some believe modern creative subjects like, science and technology are more necessary to develop today's world. I agree with the latter view because these subjects are problem-solving and improve humanity.

Some toddlers are using mobile phones for hours each day. WHy is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

As the demand for oil and gas continues to rise, there is a growing need to explore these energy sources in remote locations. Do you believe the benefits of exploiting these areas outweigh the drawbacks of causing environmental damage? 4.5

Some people says we should use free space in town and city for plantation a d some says that it should be used for construction. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that family is more important than friends. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give opinions.