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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT COMPETITION AT WORK, AT SCHOOL AND IN DAILY LIFE IS A GOOD THING. OTHER BELIEVE THAT WE SHOULD TRY TO COOPERATE MORE RATTHER THAN COMPETING AGAINST EACH OTHER DISCUSS BOTH OF THESE VIEWN AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION

IT IS ARGUED THAT SOME INDIVIDUALS THINK THAT
A
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COMPETITIVE BEHAVIOUR IS
PREFERED
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PREFERRED
 AT
WORK
Use synonyms
, SCHOOL, AND IN DAILY LIFE.
Linking Words
HOWEVER
Add a comma
HOWEVER,
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 SOME PEOPLE THINK A PERSON SHOULD BE MORE
COOPERTIVE
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COOPERATIVE
. PEOPLE HAVE DIFFERENT VIEWS ABOUT
THIS
Linking Words
 MATTER.
WHILE
Linking Words
 COMPETITION COULD BE USEFUL IN
WORK
Use synonyms
 PLACE, EDUCATIONAL CLASSES, OR IN DAILY LIFE, I
BELEIVE
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BELIEVE
 COOPERATING IS EVEN MORE IMPORTANT. ON
ONE
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THE ONE
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 HAND, COMPETITION CAN BE A GREAT SOURCE OF
MOTIVITION
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MOTIVATION
 AND SELFE CONFIDENTCE SPECIALLY AT
WORK
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 OR
SCHOOLS
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SCHOOL
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BEACUSE
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BECAUSE
 IT IS MORE LIKELY GOING TO BE SOME KIND OF
PROMOTIONS
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PROMOTION
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 OR EXTRA MARKS.
ON THE OTHER HAND
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,
AS
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I BELIEVE
COOPREATION
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COOPERATION
 IS MORE IMPORTANT AND
SOULD
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SHOULD
COULD
 BE ENCOURAGING RATHER THAN TRYING TO OUTDO EACH OTHER.
FIRSTLY
Linking Words
 BEING
COOPERTAIVE
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COOPERATIVE
CO-OPERATIVE
HELP
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HELPS
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 YOU STAY SOCIALLY ACTIVE WHETHER IT IS
IN
Change preposition
AT
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WORK
Use synonyms
, UNIVERSITY, OR SIMPLY IN YOUR DAILY LIFE.
FURTHERMORE
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, IT IS EXPECTED TO HAVE GROUP PROJECTS IN SCHOOLS OR
WORK
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 AND THAT
REQUIER
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REQUIRES
REQUIRE
 COLLABORATION SKILLS. IN
CONCUSION
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CONCLUSION
, I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY SOME INDIVIDUALS PREFER COMPETING AGAINST EACH OTHER RATHER THAN
COOPERATE
Wrong verb form
COOPERATING
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, BUT IT SEEMS TO ME THAT COLLABORATION TO
ACHIVE
Correct your spelling
ACHIEVE
ARCHIVE
 GOALS IS MUCH BETTER.

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language
Make sure to check your spelling and grammar mistakes.
content
Try to give more specific examples to support your points.
coherence
Use linking words to connect your ideas better.
content
You presented both sides of the argument well.
content
Your opinions were clear and stated clearly in the conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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