In the 20th century, contact between different parts of the world has developed rapidly thanks to air travel and telecommunication. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

There is no denying the fact that in the 20th century,
air
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travel and telecommunication had improved the contact between different areas all over the world. I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
This
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essay will analyze
this
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topic from both points of view. One advantage that telecommunication has made is making communication between
people
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faster and easier, it helps societies to keep in touch with each other at any time and in any place. Asking about
people
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who live in a different part of the world is available with a click, it avoids the need to send paper mail to other
people
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.
For example
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, if a person is living in the UK for educational purposes, he can call his family members through a variety of methods
such
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as video calls, text messages, emails or even
via
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apply
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social media apps. Despite the advantages,
air
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travel increases the percentage of pollution , because planes throw garbage into the water and lots of emissions into the
air
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e.g. carbon emissions.
In addition
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to that, it has a huge impact on climate change, because of the chemicals which are used in planes' main energy source.
For instance
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, planes use a type of patrol which has an effect on
air
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pollution and water pollution,
this
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will
also
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lead to many diseases all over the world.
To conclude
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, in the 20th century, telecommunication and
air
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travel have made contact between
people
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in different parts of the universe easier and faster, but it has a negative effect on the environment like climate change. In my opinion, it is a good way to contact other
people
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in different countries in a short time.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to organize your paragraphs better. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea.
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Make sure to provide a stronger conclusion. Summarize your main points clearly.
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Include more specific examples to support your arguments.
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You clearly state your opinion in the introduction.
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You provide relevant advantages and disadvantages.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • travel
  • communication
  • global
  • cultural
  • understanding
  • cooperation
  • education
  • leisure
  • economic
  • technology
  • connect
  • personal
  • business
  • disease
  • pandemic
  • environment
  • pollution
  • climate
  • change
  • diversity
  • tradition
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