The only reason why people work hard is to earn money and there is no other reason for doing so. To what degree do you support or oppose this idea?

The assertion that financial gain is the exclusive motivator for hard
work
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is a narrow perspective that overlooks the complex tapestry of human ambition and
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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. I strongly oppose
this
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idea, as individuals are driven by
multifaceted
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a multifaceted
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array of reasons, including personal satisfaction and social contribution which often transcend more than monetary compensation.
Firstly
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, a significant number of people are propelled by an
instric
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intrinsic
desire
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for personal
fulfillment
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fulfilment
show examples
and purpose.
Work
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, for many, is not merely a means to an end but a source of identity, achievement, and meaning. Professionals in
fiels
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fields
files
such
Linking Words
as healthcare, education, or humanitarian aid,
for instance
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, often dedicate
themseves
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themselves
to demanding roles, working long hours and facing
immerse
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immense
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pressure,
sometims
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sometimes
for modest salaries. Their primary motivation stems from a profound
desire
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to make a tangible difference in people's lives, contribute to society, or pursue a passion.
Similarly
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, artists or investigations,
driven
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are driven
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by curiosity,
they
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the
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joy of discovery, or the compulsion to create rather than solely by the promise of financial reward. The dedication of a medical researcher striving for a cure for a disease, or a teacher
tirelessl
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tirelessly
tireless
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nurturing
nuturing
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nurturing
young minds, exemplifies the deep-seated drive for impact and personal resonance
Secondly
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, beyond individual satisfaction, the
desire
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for social contribution and recognition
also
Linking Words
serves as
powerful
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a powerful
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incentive for hard
work
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. People inherently seek validation, respect, and the opportunity to leave a lasting legacy.
This
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can manifest in various ways, from striving for promotions and
leaderships
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leadership
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roles within a company to volunteering countless hours for community
intiatitives
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initiatives
.
While
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promotions often come with increased pay, the accompanying status, influence, and recognition from peers and superiors are equally, if not more, motivating for many. Consider the countless individuals who dedicate their time to non-profit organizations or local government often with minimal financial reward , driven by a commitment to their communities and the
desire
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to see positive change. Even
is
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in
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competitive corporate environments, employees might
work
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hard to be part of
a groundbreaking projects
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groundbreaking projects
a groundbreaking project
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or to earn the respect of their industry motivations that extend beyond their paychecks. In conclusion, the notion that hard
work
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is
exclusive
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exclusively
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driven by the pursuit of money is a simplistic and inaccurate portrayal of human motivation.
While
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finacial
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financial
security is undeniably a significant factor, individuals are equally, if not more, influenced by
instrinsic
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intrinsic
desires for purpose, personal growth and social contribution.

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Language
Make sure to check spelling and grammar carefully. Words like 'instric', 'the joy of discovery, or the compulsion to create' could confuse readers.
Cohesion
Try to connect your ideas more smoothly with linking words like 'Moreover' or 'In addition.' This helps the reader understand how your points relate to each other.
Content
You provide strong examples of different professions that show motivations beyond money, which enhances your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • earn
  • money
  • work hard
  • basic needs
  • food
  • shelter
  • purpose
  • achievement
  • passions
  • art
  • science
  • fulfillment
  • satisfaction
  • contribute
  • motivate
  • efforts
  • society
  • success
  • career
  • goals
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