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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Today, more and more people are waiting until their thirties to get married and have children. Do you think it is a positive or negative trend?

Getting married is one of the most important decisions in the life of every human being, and the majority of individuals prefer to wait for it until they reach their thirties. In my opinion,
this
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 trend is positive as
people
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 have more time to focus on their careers, and better to give the desired luxurious life to their
children
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. Admittedly, after a certain age, individuals get more mature and can concentrate more on building a better relationship with their partners, which leads to having a long-lasting relationship.
Moreover
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, if they cross a certain age, they have more time to educate themselves for the proper upbringing of their juveniles.
For example
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, as per
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent research by a magazine, it has been proven that 80-90% of
people
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 educate themselves before getting involved in a relationship to be self-confident about the nurturing of
children
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 and to have a lasting connection with their partner.
In addition
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 to
this
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,
this
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 trend is
also
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 advantageous for some of the women who are career-oriented, which makes them capable of achieving their careers before starting a new chapter of their lives.
Along with
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 that, most
people
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 succeed in giving their
children
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 a luxurious life as planned when they have enough time to build up investments. In conclusion, getting married until
thirties
Change the article
the thirties
show examples
 has brought a lot of merits to society as
people
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 have become more career-oriented,
as well as
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 raising the lifestyle of the countries by providing their
children
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 best nurturing.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details to help your essay flow better.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas and arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Try to check your writing for minor grammatical errors, as they can affect clarity and understanding.
task achievement
Your introduction presents the topic clearly and states your opinion and arguments well.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion summarizes the key points effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • emotional maturity
  • life experience
  • career development
  • professional achievements
  • job satisfaction
  • health risks
  • quality of parenting
  • societal changes
  • cultural expectations
  • gender roles
  • educational attainment
  • secure environment
  • life experience
  • shifting trends
  • medical advice
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