IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

One day the world's oil and gas reserves will run out. The search for alternative energy sources like wind power, solar power, burning waste, and water power are causing as much environmental damage as the oil and nuclear power sources they are intended to replace. How far do you agree with this latter statement? What possible benefits do the alternative energy sources bring? OR What damage do they cause?

In recent years, the growing influence of the environment has sparked debate among the general public.
Although
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 some individuals argue that the search for
alternative
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energy
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sources
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 like wind
power
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, solar
power
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, burning
waste
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, and water
power
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 are causing as much environmental damage as the oil and nuclear
power
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sources
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 they are intended to replace. I firmly believe that
alternative
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energy
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sources
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also
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 bring environmental and societal benefits.
This
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 essay will aim to provide a comprehensive analysis of these differing viewpoints. On the one hand, it is essential to acknowledge that individuals ought to recognize the considerable environmental impact of traditional
energy
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sources
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. A critical aspect to consider is gas emissions (oil and gas) oil spills water contamination, and environmental drawbacks of
alternative
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energy
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sources
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.
For example
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, it is noteworthy that nuclear
waste
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 disposal and risks of accidents (e.g., Fukushima).
Furthermore
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, another pivotal point to highlight is some
alternative
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energy
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sources
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 may
also
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 cause environmental damage
such
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 as wind
power
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, solar
power
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, hydropower, and burning
waste
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 (biomass).
This
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 arises from the fact that noise pollution, a threat to birds and bats, visual landscape changes, habitat destruction for large solar farms, toxic
waste
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 from panel production, disruption of aquatic ecosystems, displacement of communities,
and
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apply
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air pollution, CO₂: emissions, and potential health risks.
On the other hand
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, it is crucial to examine the opposing viewpoint that highlights the positive aspects like reduction in carbon emissions. A significant factor to explore is renewability and
energy
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 security. To illustrate
this
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 perspective, one might refer to
energy
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sources
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 that won’t run out
and
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apply
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reduced dependence on fossil fuels, and job creation in the green
energy
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 sector.
Additionally
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, it is pertinent to note that lower
long-tern
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long-term
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 environmental impact, especially with proper management and innovation, and
alternative
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energy
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 does have some environmental costs, they are often less severe and more manageable than those from fossil fuels and nuclear
energy
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, which plays a significant role in
this
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 discussion.
This
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 assertion is supported by the fact that it the importance of sustainable practices and technological improvement to minimize these impacts, thereby providing a clearer understanding of the complexities involved. In conclusion, an analysis of the differing perspectives on the environment highlights that the appropriate approach largely depends on individual circumstances and broader social contexts.
While
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 the environmental impact of traditional
energy
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sources
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 has its strengths, the environmental and societal benefits of
alternative
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energy
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sources
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also
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 offer valid points. Ultimately,
this
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 examination encourages individuals to reflect on their preferences and the experiences that influence their decisions.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly explain the main ideas in each paragraph. Avoid overly complex sentences to improve clarity.
task achievement
Use specific examples for your points. This helps the reader understand your ideas better.
task achievement
Strengthen your introduction by clearly stating your opinion more succinctly. This guides the reader from the start.
task achievement
You presented different sides of the argument, showing a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion nicely summarizes the main points and reflects on the discussion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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