IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Write a letter to the cinema manager to inform him/ her that you have lost your bag in the cinema. In your letter you should - tell exactly what happened and when - explain where you think you left the bag - ask the manager to help find your bag.

Dear Sir,
l
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 am writing
this
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 letter to help me find my
bag
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 which I mistakenly left in the cinema hall
last
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 night.
l
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 and my friend yesterday booked tickets for the newly released movie, The Hit at your cinema location. To add more details, the show commenced at 9 in the evening and wrapped around midnight. After the show was over
while
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 evacuating the hall which was number 8, I forgot about taking my
bag
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 with me.  Actually what happened exactly was that during the interval of the movie, I grabbed some food from the available food counter in the hall and there was no more room for my
bag
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 on my lap so
l
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 kept it under my seat, in row G number 8. So
l
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 believe it should be there only unless the cleaners have found it and deposited it in the lost and found centre of the mall. To make it easier for you to identify the
bag
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, it is a black colour coach side
bag
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 with coach written in golden colour at the bottom left corner. The
bag
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 is very important to me as it contains my driver's license and some bank cards as well so I would really be grateful
of
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to
show examples
 you if you could help me find my purse. Look forward to your reply. Yours faithfully, Navneet Kaur

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use clear paragraphing. Each paragraph should have its main idea. For example, start with what happened, then where you left the bag, and finally your request for help.
task achievement
You could add a polite closing request, such as 'I would appreciate any help you can provide.' This would make your tone even better.
task achievement
You clearly explain what happened and where you left your bag. This helps the manager understand the situation well.
suitable writing tone
Your closing is polite and appropriate for a letter. It shows good writing tone.
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