IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon.Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Do you agree?

In recent years, online
education
Use synonyms
 is more attractive than traditional classroom learning.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with
this
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 statement as online learning provides
flexible
Add an article
a flexible
show examples
 schedule, personalized lessons for each student, and
requirement
Replace the word
a required
show examples
 amount of digital
devices
Use synonyms
. It is vital to understand that
students
Use synonyms
 manage their
time
Use synonyms
 flexibility through studying online.
In other words
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, online
education
Use synonyms
 not only allows
students
Use synonyms
 to learn everywhere or without geographical
barre
Correct your spelling
barriers
show examples
 or distance, but
also
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
does not waste
time
Use synonyms
-travelling
such
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 as offline
education
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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, it is e-learning that
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 pressure for
students
Use synonyms
 to
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
 comfortable and spend their
time
Use synonyms
 for leisure activities to improve physical and
metal
Correct your spelling
mental
show examples
 health. Another point worth mentioning is that
students
Use synonyms
 select suitable lessons with their ability and
time
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 to say,
data-driven
Correct article usage
a data-driven
show examples
 system can adapt to individual learning styles and progress, resulting
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
 study
might be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 improved.
For instance
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, some folks
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
fit in with evening study
time
Use synonyms
 since these conditions will make
Correct pronoun usage
their brain
show examples
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
 more productive and comfortable.
Hence
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, virtual learning
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 people choose courses
suit
Correct pronoun usage
that suit
show examples
 their daily schedule and academic level.
However
Linking Words
, some argue that online
education
Use synonyms
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 many digital
devices
Use synonyms
. Simply put,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some regions do not have reliable internet or access to
devices
Use synonyms
, especially in some countries where
resident
Fix the agreement mistake
residents
show examples
 have
low-income
Correct your spelling
low incomes
show examples
, and they do not
enough
Add a missing verb
have enough
show examples
 finance to purchase these.
Nevertheless
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, government or philanthropy funds can support poverty through economic development
as well as
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 technological growth.
Therefore
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,
almost
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
 places have internet and technological
devices
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
 economic advancement. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 some argue that virtual learning
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 a lot of digital
devices
Use synonyms
, it supplies
students
Use synonyms
 with flexibility and personalized lessons. If folks want to have more
time
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 other activities, they should choose e-learning to
mange
Correct your spelling
manage
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 effectively.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it with examples.
Task Achievement
Use simple sentences to present your ideas clearly.
Task Achievement
Add a few more specific examples to back up your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion.
Task Achievement
You discuss the benefits of online education well.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-Learning
  • face-to-face education
  • remote learning
  • virtual classroom
  • webinar
  • digital platform
  • self-paced learning
  • interactive learning
  • course accessibility
  • academic networking
  • pedagogy
  • synchronous/asynchronous sessions
  • MOOCs (Massive Open Online Courses)
  • edtech (educational technology)
  • holistic development
  • practical skills
  • collaborative learning
  • digital divide
  • curriculum adaptation
  • technological literacy
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