Some people think that children who spend a lot of time reading children's story books are wasting their time which could be better used doing other more useful activites. To what extent do you agree?

There is no denying the fact that some
people
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beleive
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believe
kids are wasting time reading stories
instead
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of doing other
activites
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activities
.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that doing other
activites
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activities
may be more beneficial, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. in my opinion,
i
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I
show examples
consider that reading can be really useful for
childern
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children
.
To begin
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with, kids can
defenitely
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definitely
learn lessons from reading books.
in other
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words
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words,
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childrens
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children
show examples
will get to know how to deal with other
people
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by presenting real-life scenarios and emotions. in
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addition
addtion
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addtion,
show examples
young
people
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will collect manners and values through the characters and situations they read about. which
improve
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improves
show examples
their understanding of others.
For example
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,
pinocchio
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Pinocchio
show examples
teaches us the
importence
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importance
of telling the truth and no matter what we
dont
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don't
lie. Another point to consider is that. reading boosts imagination
signifcantly
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significantly
in
children
Use synonyms
, helping them to develop their ideas. it is
also
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possible to say that stories inspire creative thinking by
creaeting
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creating
new
idea
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ideas
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, allowing
children
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to explore other places and characters through images.
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moreover
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moreover,
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imagination improves problem-solving by allowing
children
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to think outside the box.
For instance
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,
reponzol
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rapunzel
encourages imagination by that whenever
reponzol
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rapunzel
is angry, her hair turns yellow. In conclusion, despite
people
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having different views,
i
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I
show examples
believe that when
children
Use synonyms
read stories it is a valuable use of their time.

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to proofread for spelling and grammar errors, like 'beleive' and 'activites'.
coherence cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points, particularly in the second paragraph.
task achievement
Develop your ideas further for a stronger argument in favor of reading.
task achievement
You provide good examples from stories, which helps support your arguments.
task achievement
You express a clear opinion about the value of reading, which is important for the task.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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