IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that robots will play an important role in future society while others argue that robots might have negative effects on society. Discuss both of view and give your opinion.

The prevalence of
robots
Use synonyms
 will lead to a crucial role in
predictable
Correct article usage
a predictable
show examples
society
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 others think that these technologies cause
a negative impacts
Correct the article-noun agreement
a negative impact
negative impacts
show examples
 on the population. Its positive consequences related to facilitation tasks which are prepared by individuals,
in
Linking Words
contrast
Add the comma(s)
contrast,
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robots
Use synonyms
 lead to fear of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job loss among societies. In my opinion, all cutting edges especially ones that replace handmade should
implement
Wrong verb form
be implemented
show examples
 accurately and fairly on human
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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,
hence
Linking Words
; employers must make a balance between
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 and technology. In
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of the advantages of
robots
Use synonyms
, they will influence all aspects of human life
such
Linking Words
 as work. Members of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
 predict that tasks which are indeed hard
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people may
replace
Wrong verb form
be replaced
show examples
 with cutting edges. Because a person has a physical limit to do something but
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
robots
Use synonyms
 almost do everything in a short period. All entrepreneurs prefer to attract the
robots
Use synonyms
 to some
low demanded
Correct your spelling
low-demand
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 positions to reduce employees’ time to engaging less necessary things
such
Linking Words
 as some calculations in a reception.
For instance
Linking Words
, the
robots
Use synonyms
 in Park Bulvar mall in Azerbaijan
did
Verb problem
played
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a barmen role in the
coffeeshops
Correct your spelling
coffee shops
show examples
last
Linking Words
 month.
As a result
Linking Words
, a boss proclaimed more important vacancies to attract potential workers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it has some negative results
such
Linking Words
 as unemployment in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. Today, more people research a job to meet their needs compared to the past. Because living standards and conditions change day by day and the population
expose
Wrong verb form
is exposed
show examples
 to find additional jobs.
Price
Correct article usage
The price
show examples
 of goods and some utility expenditures increased and even
this
Linking Words
 tendency may continue in the future.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the widespread of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
robots
Use synonyms
 causes
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
concern
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. Some
low-waged
Correct your spelling
low-wage
show examples
 jobs
such
Linking Words
 as a receptionist and
waiter
Fix the agreement mistake
waiters
show examples
 will
replace
Wrong verb form
be replaced
show examples
 with machines,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 will lead to
more
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
 unemployment rates in countries. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
, based
o
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a report by Times journal, approximately 20% of all service staff already switched to
robots
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
 way was
critisized
Correct your spelling
criticized
criticised
 by local citizens in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
robots
Use synonyms
 facilitate humans’ work,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 dramatically cause a low workforce among the population. In my view, if companies achieve to attract individuals to high-paid jobs and the
robots
Use synonyms
 to minimum important positions, l think
this
Linking Words
 balance will
successful
Add a missing verb
be successful
show examples
 in the future.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states both views and your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the organization of your paragraphs for better flow and clarity.
task achievement
Use more examples to support your points and make them clearer.
content
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, which is good for balance.
content
There are some relevant examples, which help illustrate the points made.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • robots
  • society
  • important
  • role
  • negative
  • effects
  • tasks
  • easier
  • clean
  • homes
  • cook
  • meals
  • care
  • elderly
  • quality
  • life
  • jobs
  • fields
  • design
  • software
  • development
  • maintenance
  • technology
  • advances
  • unemployment
  • economic
  • problems
  • privacy
  • security
  • common
  • data
  • risks
  • information
  • well-being
  • medical
  • fields
  • surgeries
  • patient
  • care
  • lives
  • health
  • outcomes
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