The subjects that children are taught in schools are decided by central authorities. Some people say that teachers, not politicians, should be responsible for this task. To what extent you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Numbers
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Number
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of people think that
subjects
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that
teach
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are taught
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by schools
mainly
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are mainly
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decided by
government
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the government
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but
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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think it's
responsibility
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the responsibility
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of schools
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to teaches
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teaches
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teach
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. I Completely agree
Linking Words
Change preposition
with this
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this
Correct determiner usage
the
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notion school teachers are responsible for preparing
subjects
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First of all ,
teaches
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teachers
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are able to select
subjects
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that are appropriate for each
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students
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student
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in their class,since they are aware
about
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of
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students
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students'
student's
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interest
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interests
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.
This
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is for
teaches
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teachers
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who instruct
students
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, if
students
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are made to study dislike they never show
interest
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.
For
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example
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example,
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some
students
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like math ,physics and biology and some are
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interest
Wrong verb form
interested
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to
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in
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another field.
Secondary
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Second
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, if
Correct article usage
the government
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government prepared
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government-prepared
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subjects
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,
adding
Wrong verb form
add
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extra curriculum which is difficult for
students
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,
students
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never show
interest
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.
In
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addition
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addition,
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if school
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
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decided
Wrong verb form
decide
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what are the
subjects
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of too
much
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many
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variations in
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
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and qualifications which is obviously unfair In conclusion,
it's seems
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it seems
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to be that both government and teaches their role in education ,
Linking Words
However
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However,
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it is more beneficial for society

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task achievement
Your essay has some ideas, but each point needs more explanation. Try to add more details and examples to support your arguments better.
coherence
Check your spelling and grammar. Words like 'teaches' should be 'teachers' and 'students interest' should be 'students' interests'.
coherence
Make sure each paragraph clearly shows a main idea. Try to start each paragraph with a topic sentence that shows what you will discuss.
coherence
In your conclusion, restate your main idea clearly. Make it more convincing and make sure it connects with what you've said before.
content
You show a good understanding of the topic and have clear personal opinions.
content
You mention that teachers know their students well, which is an important point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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