Transport delays and long journey are widespread phenomenon in many cities today. What are the causes of this problem, and how could the situation be improved?

There is no denying the fact that fast transportation between cities is
crusial
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crucial
in
this
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modern world.
Recenlty
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Recently
, many delays and long journies are
occuring
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occurring
as daily bases. In
this
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essay, I will
dicuss
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discuss
the factors of
this
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issue and the approaches to
solve
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solving
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it.
To begin
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with, there are many reasons for the delays, as the population
had
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has
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increased and the demand is significantly raised for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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flights and trains and there are no alternative transportation methods.
In addition
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, bad weather conditions
such
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as heavy rain could contribute to
this
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phenomenon. Another point to consider, the authorities should consider
to build
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building
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new railways for trains between countries in order to minimize the high demand
on
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for
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flights.
For example
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, Saudi Arabia built a new railway between three main cities which helped the community to avoid the long and costly flights.
Moreover
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, the governments could take proactive steps and analyse the factors affecting
this
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problem and take the
experince
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experience
from the developed nations.
In addition
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, transportation companies must set a plan for
high
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a high
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travel season each year.
For instance
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, every year in December, families return back to their home country to spend the vacation. In conclusion, there are many solutions for these
emerged
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emerging
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situations. The responsibility is on both private companies and the governments.

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Task Achievement
Work on spelling and grammar to improve clarity. Use correct words like 'crucial' instead of 'crusial' and 'recently' instead of 'recenlty'.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details. This will help your reader follow your thoughts more easily.
Task Achievement
Try to use a greater variety of examples to clearly explain your points. This can strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Achievement
You identified key issues like population growth and bad weather as causes of transport delays.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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