It is often thought that an increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violencein the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Actually,the prevalence of cruelty in the

media

Use synonyms

causes to growth

Change preposition

of teenager

show examples

teenager

Replace the word

teenage

show examples

crime. Today,

Correct your spelling

show examples

and online resources consist of a lot of news related to offenders and bad accidents.

Additionally

Linking Words

, juveniles’ minds develop day by day so their characters

also

Linking Words

change during a maturity period.

Therefore

Linking Words

, l absolutely agree with

this

Linking Words

statement based on these aspects. In

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

of the role of the

media

Use synonyms

, it has a comprehensive capacity to deliver all information in a short period. Some children especially

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

like to watch TV and social

media

Use synonyms

encounter crime videos and stories

then

Linking Words

they fall

down

Change preposition

apply

show examples

under pressure. Because their brain capacity does not refresh bad or good accidents,

as a result

Linking Words

, it causes a

dramatically

Change the word

dramatic

show examples

increase

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

number of juvenile offenders. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, the population of Azerbaijan have encountered

cruel

Replace the word

cruelty

show examples

from teenagers in order to a “Blue Shark” game on social

media

Use synonyms

since 2015.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some internal factors like attitudes and characteristic features influence children’s

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

. Between a child and teenager period, their mindsets face different situations

such

Linking Words

as bad life stories on TV shows and viral trends on online platforms.

Firstly

Linking Words

, these events require various approaches,

for example

Linking Words

, a juvenile who has a strong perception ability,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

easily understands a circumstance, and

in contrast

Linking Words

, a person who has a weak mindset,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

fails to filter bad or good situations.

Hence

Linking Words

, their wrong approaches cause a crime.

For instance

Linking Words

, based on a report by psychologists, approximately 40% of parents bring their children to hospital

due to

Linking Words

mental problems. In conclusion, the widespread of

media

Use synonyms

brings some bad results among the young generation members. They see videos and news on

media

Use synonyms

and convert them to a potential killer.

Moreover

Linking Words

, their mental health

also

Linking Words

effect

Verb problem

affects

show examples

their behaviors.

i.nureddinnFri Jun 06 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction presents your opinion but could be clearer. You could briefly state your reasons for agreeing.

coherence and cohesion

Try to connect your paragraphs better. Use linking phrases to show how your ideas relate to each other.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to check your grammar and sentence structure. Some sentences are hard to follow because of mistakes.

task achievement

You have made a solid attempt to express your views on the topic.

task achievement

You provided an interesting example of a social media challenge, which engages the reader.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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It is often thought that an increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violencein the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative trend?

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?