Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reason for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development

Nowadays, many people discuss that

smart

Correct your spelling

smartphones

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phone

Unnecessary verb

apply

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used in a large part of their

freetime

Correct your spelling

free time

. Opinions are divided as to whether it has benefits to proceed as common rather than giving the negative effects to

overall

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users.

Thus

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this

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essay will describe both the advantages and the disadvantages of

this

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story and provide a conclusion.

To begin

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with, with the rapid development of technology, especially electronic devices, people tend to interested in mobiles than before. They can use it for working, socializing, or learning with one device.

Moreover

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, it has easy access to information, compared to books or libraries, and it will increase dependency on mobile apps for daily tasks.

For instance

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, many companies adapt their workflow and communication tools to proceed with phones,

such

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as producing applications

Remove the comma

apply

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or organising schedules.

Consequently

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, they have the potential to perform it on a common basis in their daily lives.

On the other hand

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, these devices reduce interaction

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between

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humans, like

face-to-face

Add an article

a face-to-face

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conversation, outdoor activities, or dining at

the

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restaurant.

Furthermore

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, these tools give rise

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mental illnesses that they might become dependent on, and cause various social issues.

For example

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, many children focus on their cell

phone

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phones

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for long hours,

instead

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of going outside or talking with their families,

hence

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they will have an impact on their emotions and body, which affects their future sociability and

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

To conclude

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this

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tool plays a crucial role in our lives. It has huge benefits for various sectors in the world.

Nevertheless

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this

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may have negative effects on both physical and mental health, if we are an uncontrolled person.

As a result

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this

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should be controlled, particularly children, who cannot make decisions by themselves.

majorbreakersSat Jun 07 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction needs a clearer statement of your opinion on whether the smartphone use is positive or negative. Try to include this to guide your reader better.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure each paragraph clearly relates back to the main idea. Use connecting words to help the flow of your ideas.

task achievement

Add more specific examples in your points, especially for the negative effects on mental health. This will strengthen your argument.

task achievement

You effectively introduced the main points of the essay, setting up a balanced discussion on the topic.

task achievement

Your writing shows an attempt to explore both sides of the issue, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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16
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphone
communication
information
entertainment
leisure
connected
productivity
tasks
schedules
dependency
shopping
convenient
access
family
friends
games
videos
social media
free time
development
positive
negative

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Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reason for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development

Your opinion

In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents' absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, people do not recycle waste materials, such as bottles and newspapers. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem?

Some people choose to have their first child at an older age. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, the number of people suffering from stress is increasing. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to tackle it?