IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that the best way to improve safety is by reducing the maximum speed limits on vehicles others think there are other better ways. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Safety is the number one priority which helps to save the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 of human beings and different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of rules and regulations
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been introduced by the government. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that the reduction in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
vehicles
Change noun form
vehicle's
vehicles'
show examples
 speed can secure
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
accidents and other
people
Use synonyms
 oppose the notion and
says
Correct subject-verb agreement
say
show examples
 that there are other better ways . I am going to discuss my opinion and both sides in the following paragraphs. To commence with, I strongly believe,
reducing
Correct word choice
that reducing
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 the speed will assist
people
Use synonyms
 to become more vigilant
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their surroundings
hence
Linking Words
 they can solve a convoluted situation with their
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
 skills as they will have enough time to think and react.
For instance
Linking Words
, the Canadian government has reduced the speed in the school zone from 40km/
hrs
Fix the agreement mistake
hr
show examples
 to 30km/
hrs
Fix the agreement mistake
hr
show examples
 which
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 proven very beneficial for the welfare of the individuals.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , some
people
Use synonyms
insists
Change the verb form
insist
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 that other rules should be implemented in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
devaluating
Verb problem
devalue
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 the accident ratio. If someone
drive
Change the verb form
drives
show examples
 recklessly the government should take strict actions like fines , suspension of driving license and demerits points should be given to the culprits and
this
Linking Words
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
 a lesson for them .
For instance
Linking Words
, as per the survey, more than 100 accidents
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been recorded in a day in Ontario because they didn't obey the traffic rules .
To conclude
Linking Words
,
reduction
Correct article usage
a reduction
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
speed has a plethora of advantages which helps all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individual's
Change the noun form
individuals
individual
show examples
 to be safe on the roads and all the credit goes to the higher authorities.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly outline both sides of the argument in separate paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more examples for each side of the argument to support your points.
language quality
Try to use simpler sentences to make your ideas clearer.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion on the topic, which is important for task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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