IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe global trade is the best way for an economy to grow. However, others believe we should only produce and buy products made in our own country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A highly controversial issue today relates to economic growth and whether countries should open up their
economies
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 for global
trade
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 or adopt a domestic production and sale
approach
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. In
this
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 essay, I will examine
this
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 question from
both
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 perspectives and
then
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 explain why I believe that the second
approach
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 is crucial for the
economy
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 to prosper and grow. The debate over economic strategies—open versus closed
economies
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—has been ongoing. Advocates of open
economies
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 emphasize the benefits of global
trade
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,
while
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 proponents of closed
economies
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 highlight the advantages of self-reliance.
This
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 essay examines
both
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 perspectives and contends that a hybrid
approach
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, combining the strengths of
both
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 models, is most conducive to long-term economic prosperity. Supporters of an open
economy
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 argue that engaging in international
trade
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 fosters economic growth by facilitating access to foreign markets, technology, and investment.
For instance
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, countries like South Korea have leveraged global
trade
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 to enhance their technological capabilities and economic standing.
Furthermore
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, open
economies
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 can benefit from external funding sources, which are crucial during periods of high domestic borrowing costs. A notable example is the reconstruction efforts in post-war Iraq, where international investments played a pivotal role in rebuilding infrastructure.
Conversely
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, proponents of a closed
economy
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 argue that limiting foreign competition allows domestic industries to flourish, leading to job creation and economic stability. Historically, nations
such
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 as Japan and China have implemented protectionist policies to nurture local industries before gradually opening up to global markets.
Additionally
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, a closed
economy
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 can safeguard national assets and prevent the outflow of critical technologies.
For example
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, China's strategic control over its technological sectors has been instrumental in maintaining its economic sovereignty. In conclusion,
while
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both
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 open and closed economic models offer distinct advantages, a hybrid
approach
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 that incorporates the benefits of global
trade
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 with the protection of key domestic industries is most effective.
Such
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 a strategy ensures economic resilience and sustainable growth in an increasingly interconnected world

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your viewpoint earlier.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words to connect ideas smoothly, like 'furthermore' or 'however'.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a good introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You provide strong arguments for both sides of the debate.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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