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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below shows the percentage of young people at university in six European countries in 2000 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage of young people at university in six European countries in 2000 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar
grapht
Correct your spelling
graph
graphs
 illustrates the per cent of young
people
Use synonyms
 at university in six countries in two different
yeras
Correct your spelling
years
 2000 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the percentage of young
people
Use synonyms
 increased in 2007 in Italy ,Poland and the UK .
While
Linking Words
 the youngest
people
Use synonyms
 in Finland
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the same in both years. Among young individuals , in Poland, the percentage in 2007 was 78% which is more than 64% in 2000 .
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , in Spain, young
people
Use synonyms
 in 2000
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 more than
2007
Change preposition
in 2007
show examples
 with 46%and 41%, respectively , but in Finland , young individuals
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the same per cent 70% in both years.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in
Italy
Add a comma
Italy,
show examples
 the ratio of
Correct article usage
the yougest
show examples
yougest
Correct your spelling
youngest
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 increased
around
Change preposition
by around
show examples
 10% between
2000and
Correct your spelling
2000 and
 2007. Even in the UK the percentage of individuals
growth
Replace the word
grew
show examples
 from 46% in 2000 to 54% in 2007.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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