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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
The line graph illustrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
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the changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the average carbon dioxide( CO2)
emissions
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 in each
Use synonyms
person
Check wording
country
show examples
 in four countries, which are
United
Correct article usage
the United
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Kindom
Use the right word
Kingdom
show examples
,
Sweden
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, Italy and Portugal
Punctuation problem
, from1967
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from1967
Correct your spelling
from 1967
 to 2007. The
emissions
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 are calculated by metric
tonnes
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.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 the volume of
emissions
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 of
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
Kindom
Use the right word
Kingdom
show examples
witeness ed
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witnesses
 the
hightest
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highest
 ranking among the four
countrie
Correct your spelling
countries
;
however
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Porgual
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Portugal
 shows the lowest
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Besides
Linking Words
,the UK and
Sweden
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 saw a fall in
per
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per-person
show examples
person
Use synonyms
 CO2
emissions
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 over the four decades,
while
Linking Words
 Italy and Portugal had a continuous increase. In 1967, the United Kingdom ranked first in carbon dioxide
emissions
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, at approximately 11 metric
tonnes
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.
Thereafter
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 figure exhibited a gradual downward trend, reaching merely 6 by 2007. For
Sweden
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, there is
Correct article usage
a slightly
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slightly promoted
Replace the word
slight promotion
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 in
first
Correct article usage
the first
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 decade,
then
Linking Words
 shows a
rapidly declined
Replace the word
rapid decline
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 over the past three decades, which landed at almost 5.8.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Italy and Portugal's
emissions
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 went up all the time. Italy's per
person
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 carbon dioxide(CO2)
emissions
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 rose steadily from about 4.2 metric
tonnes
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 in 1967 to almost 8
metreic
Correct your spelling
metric
tonnes
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 in 2007.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there is a junction
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1987 with
Sweden
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. Portugal had the lowest
emissions
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 in 1967, at only 1.8 metric
tonnes
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 per
person
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. It
then
Linking Words
 grew fast over the decades, reaching about 5.8
per
Correct word order
CO2 per person
show examples
person
Use synonyms
 CO2 in 2007 ,the same level as that of
Sweden
Use synonyms
.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words co, emissions, person, sweden, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon dioxide emissions
  • per person
  • United Kingdom
  • Sweden
  • Italy
  • Portugal
  • graph
  • compare
  • average
  • increase
  • decrease
  • trend
  • peak
  • decline
  • years
  • period
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