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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
The chart illustrates data on
carbon
Use synonyms
 dioxide
emissions
Use synonyms
each
Change preposition
per
show examples
 person on
averge
Correct your spelling
average
 in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.(different countries)
Overall
Linking Words
, U' s
carbon
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
 remained by far the dominant
emisson
Correct your spelling
emission
 throughout the period and continued
decrease
Change preposition
to decrease
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.
Carbon
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
 of S rose to a peak in
1977
Punctuation problem
1977,
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then
Linking Words
 witnessed a downward trend.
In contrast
Linking Words
 ,
emissions
Use synonyms
 for I and
P
Use synonyms
incrreased
Correct your spelling
increased
 dramatically. In
1967
Punctuation problem
1967,
show examples
 U
emission
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 stood at about 11 metric
tonnes
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,
while
Linking Words
P
Use synonyms
emission
Use synonyms
 was much lower ,only at around 1.5 metric
tonnes
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. From 1967 to 1977,
carbon
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
emission
Check wording
emissions
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 of S, I and
P
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 had a dramatic increase,and
emissions
Use synonyms
 for S climbed to
it's
Use the right word
its
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 peak at 10.5 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1977.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
The
Fix capitalization
the
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 highest U 's
emission
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unchanged
Verb problem
remains unchanged
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 relatively .Between 1977
to
Correct word choice
and
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 2007,
carbon
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emission
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 U and S created declined consistently and in 1987 S'
emission
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 plummeted to 7 metric
tonnes
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,
I
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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 overtaking S as the second.In 2007 they reaspectively reaching to 9% and 5.5%.
While
Linking Words
 I and
P
Use synonyms
 increased uniformly and remained stable between 1997
to
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 2007,reaching to 7.5% and 5.5% respectively.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast, while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words carbon, emissions, p, emission, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon dioxide emissions
  • per person
  • United Kingdom
  • Sweden
  • Italy
  • Portugal
  • graph
  • compare
  • average
  • increase
  • decrease
  • trend
  • peak
  • decline
  • years
  • period
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