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Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart shows the types of media that people of different age groups used to get daily news in one country in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the types of media that people of different age groups used to get daily news in one country in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar graph shows the distribution of the types of
media
Use synonyms
 which people usually use to obtain information, in terms of age groups, in 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, the group of blog readers is the smallest one in every age category.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the proportion of
radio
Use synonyms
 users
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
 to be the highest in the four age categories, involving 18-29, 30-49, 50-64 and over 65. Specifically, the percentages of
Micro blogging
Correct your spelling
Microblogging
show examples
 are
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 as follows; 20% (10-17), 25% (18-29), 15% (30-49), 8% (50-64) and below 5% (65+).
In contrast
Linking Words
, those of the
radio
Use synonyms
 usage are 40%, 95%, 95%, 95% and about 88% in the same order, indicating that
youger
Correct your spelling
younger
 populations who are aged from 10 to 17 are less likely to leverage the
radio
Use synonyms
 as the resources of information.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the fluctuation of the percentages of social network users is notable.
For example
Linking Words
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the proportions are 80% in the two sections, 10-17 and 18-29, those figures decline as the ages become greater; 46% (30-49), 33% (50-64) and 10% (65+).
This
Linking Words
 trend displays that the older people are, the less they use social
media
Use synonyms
 to obtain information. In comparison, it becomes obvious that only one group, 10-17, prefers social
media
Use synonyms
 to the
radio
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, elderly generations tend to depend on the
radio
Use synonyms
 to know daily news rather than other
media
Use synonyms
.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words media, radio with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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