IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people think that the government should provide assistance to all kinds of artist including painters, musicians and poets. However, other people think that this is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Introduction
Art
Use synonyms
 is an
essntial
Correct your spelling
essential
 component of human
culutre
Correct your spelling
culture
.
While
Linking Words
 some people agree and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 dont with the support of
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 on
art
Use synonyms
, the
fund
Replace the word
funding
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
artist
Fix the agreement mistake
artists
show examples
 comes in many different ways
such
Linking Words
 as creating an
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 to host
art
Use synonyms
 and develop skills for different ages of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Body paragraph 1
However
Linking Words
, for the other
opinoin
Correct your spelling
opinion
 holder of people not
agreening
Correct your spelling
agreeing
 with
govermenet
Correct your spelling
government
 support for arts. As part of the disagreeing might be true that
art
Use synonyms
 is a gift from god and should not be supported by anyone since
its
Correct your spelling
it is
show examples
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 of money.
Well
Add the punctuation
Well,
show examples
 of the money
spends
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 on
artist
Fix the agreement mistake
artists
show examples
 directly
this
Linking Words
 will not help the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
 of creativity and hosting a
culutre
Correct your spelling
culture
 of
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
 yet to come.
Conclusion
Moreover
Linking Words
, arts are crucial for culture to
develp
Correct your spelling
develop
,
while
Linking Words
 agreeing and disagreeing will not change the impact of
art
Use synonyms
 on culture.
Fund
Fix the agreement mistake
Funds
show examples
 and support
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of
industry
Fix the agreement mistake
industries
show examples
 should come from non-profit
organzation
Correct your spelling
organisations
 to turn arts into
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
revenue to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and all will benefit from it.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction. This helps the reader understand your position right away.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should cover one main idea to improve clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Check your spelling and grammar to make your writing easier to read. Mistakes can confuse the reader.
task achievement
Provide examples to support your points. This makes your arguments stronger and clearer.
task achievement
You have addressed both views, showing an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
You expressed the importance of art in culture, which is a relevant point.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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