More and more people buy a wide range of electrical household goods like television, microwave ovens and rice cookers. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

An increasing number of people are choosing to purchase domestic appliances. In my opinion,

this

Linking Words

is a positive development because it saves their

time

Use synonyms

they not only earn more

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

take a good amount of rest. The primary concern about buying electrical household goods is the

time

Use synonyms

. Nowadays, people

work

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

the

demand

Fix the agreement mistake

demands

show examples

market

Add an article

the market

show examples

as well as

Linking Words

in order to maintain their expenses, which

led

Wrong verb form

leads

show examples

to a busy lifestyle

As a result

Linking Words

, they have less

time

Use synonyms

for

households

Fix the agreement mistake

household

show examples

chores .

thus

Linking Words

individuals not only earn more, but

also

Linking Words

work

Use synonyms

effortlessly with the help of electric gadgets.

For instance

Linking Words

. Whirlpool, which is a renowned brand in India for making electrical apparatus manufactures a 360° rotational washing machine, which cleans the cloth nicely, and is in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

great demand as it not

Correct your spelling

only removes

onlyremoves

Correct your spelling

only removes

the stains from the clothes

as well as

Linking Words

saves

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

for

show examples

working women's An additional reason for my stance is proper rest. A case in point is stress which comes from the burden of all the

work

Use synonyms

done by a single person. In past, there

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

joint families, so the

work

Use synonyms

was distributed among all the family members, but now

due to

Linking Words

the nuclear families, all the domestic works are done by a single person.

Accordingly

Linking Words

, it saves their

time

Use synonyms

hence

Linking Words

, Humans can spend

time

Use synonyms

with their family having their quality

time

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

it has become more popular for people to buy electrical goods, it has

bought

Correct your spelling

brought

show examples

too many benefits like earning more and avoiding stressful life for

this

Linking Words

to be considered a positive trend

13navneetkaur13Fri Jun 13 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Add a clearer introduction that states your opinion explicitly.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows smoothly to the next.

Task Achievement

Provide more specific examples and explain them thoroughly.

Task Achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic.

Task Achievement

The use of examples such as the washing machine shows understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Individuals generally commemorate the festivals for entertainment purposes, but they do not have any knowledge regarding their traditional as well as religious significance. I totally agree with this testimonial because they do not inherit good relations with their elders, and they are affected by Western culture as well.
6
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Today, in some countries, young adults account for a comparatively large proportion of the population compared with older people. I believe the upside of this situation far outweighs its downside because young people are the main drivers of economic growth.
8
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
The debate over the implications of the migration of people from rural to urban areas has sparked considerable controversy. While some argue this trend brings growth opportunities for rural people, I believe its negative impacts are of higher significance due to the reasons this essay further elaborates on.
6.5
band
Water pollution has become an increasing problem over the past few decades. What causes water pollution? How can we prevent this problem?
Water pollution has emerged as a pressing environmental issue in recent decades, posing significant threats to ecosystems and human well-being. Understanding the causes of water pollution and implementing effective prevention measures are crucial in safeguarding our precious water resources.
6.5
band
In many countries, people throw away a lot of food from restaurants and shops. Why do you think people waste food in this way? What can be done to reduce the amount of food thrown away?
In this era, there has been a growing tendency for the amount of food to go into the trash and this situation climbs up significantly every year, especially in megacities. Within the scope of this writing, many reasons will be discussed carefully and how they can be overcome.

More and more people buy a wide range of electrical household goods like television, microwave ovens and rice cookers. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Water pollution has become an increasing problem over the past few decades. What causes water pollution? How can we prevent this problem?

In many countries, people throw away a lot of food from restaurants and shops. Why do you think people waste food in this way? What can be done to reduce the amount of food thrown away?