IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As housing is a basic need for people, government should provide free housing for everyone who cannot afford it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Considering that shelter is an essential commodity, the government must make provisions for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals who are incapable of purchasing houses. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 position to a certain extent and
this
Linking Words
 essay will outline a key reason why tax contributions must fund accommodation for the needy.
Further
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, it will elaborate on the need to create systems that allow resourcefulness of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
those living with a
disability
Use synonyms
 and support them in developing ways to be relevant in the community.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, some members of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society are inherently disabled and incapable of sustaining themselves.
Hence
Linking Words
, a need for the state to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
this
Linking Words
 moral obligation. To illustrate why
this
Linking Words
 is necessary, let us consider the situation in Africa. Particularly the Zimbabwean Disabled People Association which relies heavily on government subsidies for upkeep. Some members of
this
Linking Words
 organisation live with disabilities that are incurable and
therefore
Linking Words
 cannot shelter themselves. Unless the
tax payer
Correct your spelling
taxpayer
show examples
 intervenes medically, these individuals are likely to succumb to illnesses by virtue of their dispositions.
However
Linking Words
, a clear line needs to be drawn to demarcate whom the country's
fiancial
Correct your spelling
financial
 allocation may support to avoid exploitation of
treasury
Correct article usage
the treasury
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. Potentially, the state must consider training these individuals to be
resourcesful
Correct your spelling
resourceful
. One way to achieve
this
Linking Words
 would be to incentivise research on means by which disabled members of the
ociety
Correct your spelling
society
 can profit from what they are capable of doing. In Zimbabwe, some people living with a
disability
Use synonyms
 have been trained to knit clothes and
sell
Correct pronoun usage
sell them
show examples
. As a matter of fact, John Carcel - an individual living with a
down
Capitalize word
Down
show examples
 syndrome
disability
Use synonyms
 has developed a small niche for himself selling
hand made
Correct your spelling
handmade
show examples
 apparel and knitted scarfs. Programs like these aim to nurture ability within
disability
Use synonyms
 and to change the status
qou
Correct your spelling
quo
. In conclusion, it is the capable
tax payer's
Correct your spelling
taxpayer's
show examples
 responsibility and moral obligation to support those in need. In fulfilling
this
Linking Words
, strong measures should be taken to ensure that within the cohort of those
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are in need, the few
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 have means by which to be resourceful are given the opportunity to do so.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph. This will help the reader understand the main idea of each section more easily.
task achievement
Ensure that your main points are fully explained and connected back to the main argument about housing.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples from your knowledge and experience, which enriches your argument.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion clearly states your position and summarizes the main points, which is good for coherence.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social safety net
  • Economic stability
  • Unemployment benefits
  • Financial security
  • Economic downturn
  • Poverty
  • Stimulate the economy
  • Job seeking
  • Dependency culture
  • Fiscal responsibility
  • Government expenditure
  • Labor market
  • Fraud
  • Welfare abuse
  • Quality of life
  • Budget constraints
  • Economic strain
  • Public funds
  • Employment incentives
What to do next:
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