Some people think that the detailed description of crimes on newspapers and TV has bad consequences, so this kind of information should be restricted in the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some detailed information about crime
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
broadcasted
Wrong verb form
broadcast
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on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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TV and
Newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
Newspapers
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,
while
Linking Words
some argue that
those information
Change the determiner
that information
show examples
should be restricted. I partly
agree
Add the preposition
agree on
agree to
agree with
show examples
this
Linking Words
opinion, but I think those are
somtimes
Correct your spelling
sometimes
beneficial for the decreasing of
crimes
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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with, I will
explane
Correct your spelling
explain
two benefits to show
detailed
Add an article
a detailed
show examples
description of an offender. First of all, they help not to motivate people to
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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crimes
Use synonyms
. Once they understand how long you will be in prison, if they do something
illeagal
Correct your spelling
illegal
, they become not to do
such
Linking Words
a thing.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, individuals
enhence
Correct your spelling
enhance
the alert if they know something
happens
Wrong verb form
is happening
show examples
near their residents.
For example
Linking Words
, people make it
custome
Correct your spelling
custom
to lock the door when they leave their home.
On the other hand
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,
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
private information
such
Linking Words
as phone
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
and
address
Fix the agreement mistake
addresses
show examples
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
sometimes
make
Verb problem
puts
show examples
offenders in danger.
For example
Linking Words
, some people are furious about the
crimes
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
they possibly burn
Correct article usage
the offenders
show examples
offenders
Change noun form
offenders'
offender's
show examples
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
they might be in
dificulties
Correct your spelling
difficulties
that they can not get
job
Add an article
a job
the job
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
they can not
also
Linking Words
earn money and
eventually
Add a comma
eventually,
show examples
they offend a stealing. In conclusion, there are some disadvantages and advantages
about
Change preposition
to
show examples
showing personal details of
crimes
Use synonyms
. Social media
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to decide which to handle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to expand your ideas more. Provide more examples and details to support your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use clearer connections between your ideas, like linking words or phrases to help your essay flow better.
Language Use
Check for spelling and grammatical errors, as they can interrupt the reading experience.
Task Achievement
You have presented both sides of the argument, which is good for showing balance in your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction gives a clear overview of your opinion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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