The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved.

It is true that the number of citizens who are at risk of significant medical conditions

as a result

Linking Words

of being overweight is rising. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will set out a possible reason for

this

Linking Words

increase and go on to offer a solution to

this

Linking Words

issue. These days, more and more

people

Use synonyms

have sedentary lifestyles because of their work.

This

Linking Words

is because the number of professions which require spending more time in offices has increased.

While

Linking Words

in the past, most

people

Use synonyms

worked physically, nowadays they have to spend the majority of time in front of their computers without any physical activity, which, in many situations, leads to obesity and health problems.

For example

Linking Words

, for the

last

Linking Words

50 years, the percentage of overweight

people

Use synonyms

in the USA has risen by 40%. To

adress

Correct your spelling

address

this

Linking Words

problem, governments should launch

the

Correct article usage

show examples

programme of providing free sporting centres in companies and making it a mandatory requirement for each worker to attend them on a daily basis.

This

Linking Words

will help employees include exercises in their daily routine which is part and parcel of staying fit. The statistics report that at least 30 minutes of daily

exercises

Fix the agreement mistake

exercise

show examples

are able to prevent the development of multiple diseases

such

Linking Words

as heart attacks, strokes, and diabetes by 50%. If

people

Use synonyms

this

Linking Words

approach, it will help them be healthier.

Therefore

Linking Words

, these measures must be taken in order to prevent the growth in the number of overweight

people

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, I have presented a reason why the percentage of overweight

people

Use synonyms

in society is going up and provided a possible solution to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem.

halynasmyk953Mon Jun 16 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to explain your points in more detail with clear examples.

coherence

Try to connect your ideas better; use more linking words.

task achievement

Add more specific examples from different countries or studies.

positive

Your introduction clearly states the main points of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

overweight
health problems
fast food
unhealthy
nutrition
screen time
physical activity
busy lifestyles
healthy meals
dietary choices
public spaces
exercising
marketing
advertising
appealing
cheaper

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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved.

Your opinion

in many countries in the world people buy clothes and choose hairstyles according to latest fashion. why is this happening? is this a positive or a negative development?

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the governments rather than private companies. Do you agree or disagree?

Humans in more countries spend more and more time far away from their families. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?