Some argue that zoos play an role important in conservation and education. Others argue that animals should not be kept in cages or held captive. Discuss both views.

In recent years, there has been an ongoing debate about
if
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whether
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animals
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should be held in a Zoo as a strategy to foster education and conversation,
while
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others argue that
animals
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shouldn't be kept in cages or held captive. Of course,
this
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is
a
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an
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extremely difficult topic to
adrees
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address
and
disscuss
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discuss
, because the approach is
being
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apply
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rooten
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rooted
deeply in the core values of their speakers,
letting
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leaving
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a
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apply
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few
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little
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room
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rooms
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for understanding, empathy, and the definition of an in-between solution. From my personal point of view, and as a lover and
respectuful
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respectful
human
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human has
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been
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being
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for
animals
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, I strongly believe that nowadays, with the
araise
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rise
of technology and AI, we must and we will find more efficient and sustainable ways to learn, understand, study and being in contact with
animals
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, rather than
kept
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keeping
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them held in cages or captive. On one side,
Zoos
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educates
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educate
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people about
animals
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and their habitats. For so many years, going to the Zoo has become a recreational and educational activity to do as a family, resulting in the awakening of children's aspirations, interests and understanding.
Also
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, we can't deny the fact that most of the
Zoos
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had
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apply
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played a tremendous job in
conservating
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conserving
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key species.
For example
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, some
animals
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like lions and tigers cannot survive in the wild and
therefore
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, keeping them in their early stages of life in
zoos
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can be a safe option. On the other side, keeping
animals
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in cages, and
withouth
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without
their
natual
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natural
environment where they belong, is cruel.
Furthermore
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, it's limiting their
capabilitiees
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capabilities
and natural development by being raised in a
controled
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controlled
habitat, going against the
natual
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natural
law of life. It has been proved by many studies and articles, that
animals
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in
zoos
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may suffer stress and health issues when
comparing them
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compared
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to
animals
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that
hasn't
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haven't
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been raised in a regulated environment like a Zoo.
For instance
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, we can study the case where a whale attacked and ate her trainer at SeaWorld in the early
2000´s
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2000s
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.
This
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shows the
ammount
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amount
of stress and how we are
afecting
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affecting
animals
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by keeping them captive and
use
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using
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them as
an
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apply
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entertainment. In
conclussion
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conclusion
, we should continue our efforts
of
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to
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understanding,
studing
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studying
and conservating animal species. We need to learn how to coexist
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this
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in this
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world with respect for their
lifes
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lives
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, their environments, and their needs. I have faith in the definition of creative ways to achieve that goal with the use of technology and AI. Keeping
animals
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in controlled habitats should be used as a conservation strategy,
instead
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of using
animals
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for our amusement. Evolution should be part of our history.

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Task Achievement
Make sure your introduction is clearer. It should outline the main points you will discuss in the essay. Consider revising your thesis statement for clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on the flow of your ideas. Use linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more smoothly. This will help readers follow your argument more easily.
Task Achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your points. The more specific your examples, the stronger your argument will be. This will help in achieving clarity and comprehensiveness in your ideas.
Task Achievement
You discuss both views on the topic, which is very important for this type of essay. This shows that you understand the task and are giving a balanced perspective.
Task Achievement
Your conclusion emphasizes the need for respect towards animals and points to a hopeful future with technology. This adds a personal touch to your essay and reinforces your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • zoos
  • animals
  • conservation
  • education
  • cages
  • wild
  • protect
  • endangered
  • breeding
  • programs
  • environments
  • habitats
  • awareness
  • efforts
  • cruel
  • roam
  • freely
  • natural
  • health
  • issues
  • confinement
  • behaviors
  • alternative
  • solutions
  • reserves
  • sanctuaries
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