In nearly all science course at university, there are significantly more male students than female students. What are the reason for this? What can be done to balance out the number

More and more people believe that most experts in science at university are male students.
However
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, others argue that the number of women in science remains low. In my opinion, both approaches are equally important . On one hand, it is believed by some people that think that males dominate scientific fields. In today’s job market, companies often prefer hiring male employees, assuming they possess strong technical knowledge and deep specialisation.
Moreover
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, men are generally seen as more career-focused, as they are not typically the primary caregivers in the family. A study conducted by New York University found that 90% of successful professionals were male who had dedicated themselves to one specialised field.
This
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suggests that focusing on a single career path plays a major role in professional success, especially among men.
On the other hand
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, many believe that females play an essential role in education and the workforce. Females who are educated in a variety of fields tend to be more flexible, manage multiple responsibilities effectively, and contribute significantly to a company’s success.
For instance
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, my sisters, who have strong academic backgrounds, frequently receive job offers and high salaries.
In contrast
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, my brother, who only completed primary school, struggles to find stable work.
This
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Usage
Correct article usage
The usage
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of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score. shows how women with higher education and broad skills can excel professionally. In conclusion,
while
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some argue that science is largely male-dominated, others highlight the rising importance of women in learning and work. I believe both men and females should pursue higher education and gain diverse experience to thrive in today’s competitive job market.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly outline your main points in each paragraph and stay focused on the topic throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words to connect your ideas better and ensure a smoother flow in your writing.
task achievement
You included personal examples which made your argument more relatable and engaging.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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