IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the tables below give information about sales of fairtrade labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

the tables below give information about sales of fairtrade labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.
The tables below provide data about
sales
Use synonyms
 of
fairtrade
Correct your spelling
fair trade
show examples
 labelled
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
bananas
Use synonyms
 in the UK, Switzerland, Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden in the years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1999 and 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the
sales
Use synonyms
 of
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
bananas
Use synonyms
 in the United Kingdom rose dramatically throughout the years.
While
Linking Words
 in Denmark, the
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 saw a decrease to less than 1
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
 in 2004. In 1999,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
 in Sweden accounted for 0.8
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
 only,
while
Linking Words
 banana
sales
Use synonyms
 almost doubled reaching 2
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
. Switzerland, had the highest
sales
Use synonyms
 of
coffee
Use synonyms
 with 3
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
,
conversely
Linking Words
,
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 showed a low of 1
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the UK had the highest
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 reaching a high of 15
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, 2004 experienced a rise in
sales
Use synonyms
 for both categories. Banana
sales
Use synonyms
 in the UK reached the highest
sales
Use synonyms
 at 47
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
, Belgium
sales
Use synonyms
 fell slightly to a low of 1
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
. In Denmark, the
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 reached a peak of 4
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
. The United Kingdom peaked again in
coffee
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
 reaching a high of 20
million
Use synonyms
euros
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas, while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, coffee, bananas, million, euros with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: