IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that free housing should be provided by governments for under-priviliged and people who can't afford to buy a house. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give example based on your own experience.

It is irrefutable that housing is a basic necessity
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 every human being living on the planet. It is asserted by some folks that
Correct article usage
the governement
show examples
governement
Correct your spelling
government
 must provide free housing for deprived
people
Use synonyms
 as well
to
Change preposition
as
show examples
 poor individuals. I am
harmony
Change preposition
in harmony
show examples
 with
this
Linking Words
 notion, as we shall discuss in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, it has tremendous benefits for society.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
providing
cost free
Add a hyphen
cost-free
show examples
 housing to needy
people
Use synonyms
 by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 may reduce the burning issue of homelessness,
for instance
Linking Words
, as we can normally see
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
developing countries
such
Linking Words
 as
nigeria
Change the capitalization
Nigeria
show examples
, brazil
Correct your spelling
and Brazil
, who are
continousaly
Correct your spelling
continuously
 fighting to live in a stable place.
As a result
Linking Words
, they will feel secure and safe in their lives.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 has all
powers
Correct article usage
the powers
show examples
 , they can introduce some schemes or
lotery
Correct your spelling
lottery
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
 for
people
Use synonyms
 who are living under
financial
Add an article
the financial
show examples
 burden of houses
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if they can participate will get
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 of free education with free homes,
this
Linking Words
 will aid youngsters to improve their lives through better health and job opportunities.
This
Linking Words
 will lead
less
Change preposition
to less
show examples
 pressure on authorities , and
regime
Correct article usage
the regime
show examples
 can focus
to deal
Change preposition
on dealing
show examples
 with other
crisis
Fix the agreement mistake
crises
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as environment-saving and crime.
Thirdly
Linking Words
, free housing can help families with children, giving them a secure environment to grow and learn, as we all know that our future
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 in their hands.
For example
Linking Words
, poor children without homes always feel less confident and
low
Add a missing verb
have low
show examples
 self-esteem , which can close doors to show their hidden talent. In Conclusion, free housing should be mandatory
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 all poor
people
Use synonyms
 by
Correct article usage
the governement
show examples
governement beacuse
Correct your spelling
government because
 of
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 advantages, as
this
Linking Words
 may
helpful
Replace the word
help
show examples
 to create
secure
Add an article
a secure
show examples
 environment and improve
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
show examples
 country's status
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the World.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
 can use taxes to tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem, as it is very essential to provide homes to needy
people
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your opinion and what you will discuss in the essay. The introduction can be stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your paragraphs are organized clearly. Each paragraph should focus on one idea. You may want to start with a clear topic sentence for each paragraph.
task achievement
Support your points with more specific examples and explanations. Some examples are vague and do not fully support your argument. Use personal experiences more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to spelling and grammatical errors. This can affect the readability of your essay. Try to proofread your work before submission.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion about the topic, which is a good start. Your ideas about the benefits of free housing are relevant and important.
coherence and cohesion
You connected the importance of free housing with societal benefits, like reducing homelessness and supporting families, which adds depth to your argument.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • free
  • housing
  • governments
  • underprivileged
  • afford
  • buy
  • house
  • safe
  • place
  • live
  • need
  • stable
  • home
  • health
  • job
  • opportunities
  • improve
  • lives
  • families
  • children
  • secure
  • environment
  • grow
  • learn
  • living
  • costs
  • economy
  • taxes
  • fund
  • basic
  • need
  • met
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