IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by government rather than private companies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I am of the opinion that
this
Linking Words
 view is partially valid. I think the
government
Use synonyms
 and the private company play an important role in their field.
market
Use synonyms
 competition，some companies engaging in
this
Linking Words
researchs
Correct your spelling
research
 for a
long term
Use the right word
long-term
show examples
 monopoly.So that scientific
research
Use synonyms
achievements
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 cannot be effectively applied and transformed into social welfare.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the
government
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 can plan these resources in a reasonable way to achieve better results. Some uneconomic scientific
research
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like
Punctuation problem
, like
show examples
 space
flight
Punctuation problem
flight,
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 should be protected by the
government
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.
This
Linking Words
researchs
Correct your spelling
research
cannotto
Verb problem
cannot
show examples
 bring economic benefits in the short term.
However
Linking Words
, it holds more far-reaching significance.So the
protect
Replace the word
protection
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 by the
government
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 plays a
vial
Use the right word
vital
show examples
 role in
this
Linking Words
 term. The
government
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Linking Words
also can
Correct word order
can also
show examples
 provide a more
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
 environment. For the private company, Healthy
market
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 competition can stimulate the enthusiasm for scientific
research
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.The private company will invest more resources in scientific
research
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 to seize the
market
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.It is beneficial to the long-term development of scientific
research
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. -The private
companys
Correct your spelling
companies
Linking Words
also can
Correct word order
can also
show examples
 quickly transform scientific
research
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achievements
Use synonyms
.In fields
such
Linking Words
 as the Internet and medicine, many private enterprises carry out innovation and the implementation of scientific
research
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achievements
Use synonyms
 in these areas. The
government
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 and private enterprises should divide their work and cooperate
: the
Punctuation problem
. The
show examples
government
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 maintains the stability of scientific
research
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achievements
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 in the
research
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market
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 and supports scientific
research
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 that has no short-term economic benefits,
while
Linking Words
 private enterprises conduct
all-round
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all-around
show examples
 innovation and the implementation of scientific
research
Use synonyms
achievements
Use synonyms

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structure
Make your view clear in the first sentence and finish with a short conclusion.
structure
Use four clear paragraphs: intro, two body parts, and a short ending.
grammar
Check grammar and spelling, for example ‘researchs’ and ‘companys’; use plural and standard word forms.
content
Add more exact examples and explain how they show your point.
cohesion
Use simple linking words to show how ideas are linked.
content
You show balance by giving both sides of the issue.
content
You touch on real parts like space work and health.
structure
You try to link government and private work.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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