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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the result of a survey about patients who stayed in differentwards of a hospital. The chart also shows the percentage of patients who replied'very good' about various aspects of their hospital experience. Summarize theinformation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisonswhere relevant.

The chart below shows the result of a survey about patients who stayed in differentwards of a hospital. The chart also shows the percentage of patients who replied'very good' about various aspects of their hospital experience. Summarize theinformation by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisonswhere relevant.
The bar chart illustrates the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
patients
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 who have "very good" feedback about different aspects of their hospital
experience
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 across
three
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wards
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.


Overall
Linking Words
,
patients
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 in Holly
ward
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 always have the highest satisfaction level among hospital staff, quality of treatment and quality of aftercare aspects, with
Oak
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ward
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patients
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reply
Wrong verb form
replying
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 the second
percentage
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 of "very good" and
Maple
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ward
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patients
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respond
Wrong verb form
responding
show examples
 the least,
while
Linking Words
 the waiting time section differs a bit by sharing the same
percentage
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 of
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
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 comments (52%) among
Maple
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ward
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 and
Oak
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ward
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.


It is clear that
Linking Words
 the highest percentages of satisfaction across
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three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
wards
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 are all about the
experience
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 in
treatment
Add an article
the treatment
show examples
 section.Notably, all
three
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wards
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feedback
Verb problem
received
show examples
 the same proportions of "very good" in
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
three
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section
Fix the agreement mistake
sections
show examples
 of hospital
experience
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, with Holly
ward
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accounts
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for roughly 88%,
Maple
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ward
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represents
Wrong verb form
representing
show examples
 54% and 69% in
Oak
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ward
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. It is evident that, for all
three
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wards
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, the quality of treatment received the highest
percentage
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 of “very good” ratings. Notably, all
three
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wards
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 received similar proportions of “very good” ratings in
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
three
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 aspects of hospital
experience
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, with Holly
ward
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 accounting for roughly 88%,
Maple
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ward
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 54%, and
Oak
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ward
Use synonyms
 69%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, patients, experience, three, wards, ward, oak, maple with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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