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Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information bt selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information bt selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
The line chart illustrates the evolution of the volume of urban citizens in four different Asian nations from 1970 to 2020. From an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, it is readily apparent that the
population
Use synonyms
 living in
cities
Use synonyms
 is
in
Change preposition
on
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constant
Correct article usage
a constant
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 rise across the period and is expected to continue increasing with both Indonesia and Malaysia experiencing the strongest rise in urban
population
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the proportion of individuals living in
cities
Use synonyms
 experienced
a
Remove the article
apply
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significant growth during the 70
year-period
Correct your spelling
year period
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. Indeed,
while
Linking Words
 there used to be nearly 14% of Indonesians living in urban areas in 1970,
this
Linking Words
 figure has been doubled 30 years later before reaching 50% of inhabitants. Malaysia follows a similar trend as there used to be about a third of Malaysians living in
cities
Use synonyms
 in 1970 and
this
Linking Words
 number turned out to be more than 70% of the whole
population
Use synonyms
 in 2020 and
expected
Add a missing verb
is expected
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 to reach 80% in 2040.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, other countries
such
Linking Words
 as Thailand and
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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 have experienced a gradual increase in the percentage of urban people. In fact, at the beginning of the
period
Add a comma
period,
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 approximately 19% and 31% of the
population
Use synonyms
 was residing in
cities
Use synonyms
 in Thailand and
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
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 respectively. These two numbers increased over the years and are expected
to begin
Linking Words
 converging to 46% and 47% respectively in 2040.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "to begin".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, cities with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • population density
  • trend
  • percentage
  • urban population
  • actual data
  • predictions
  • steady increase
  • striking difference
  • projection
  • fluctuation
  • contributing factors
  • demographic changes
  • socio-economic development
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