Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, more and more

sugar

Use synonyms

contained

Verb problem

is contained

show examples

in manufactured food and drink

Use synonyms

products

Punctuation problem

products,

show examples

leads

Wrong verb form

leading

show examples

to numerous health issues, and some

people

Use synonyms

argues

Correct subject-verb agreement

argue

show examples

that the price of sugary

products

Use synonyms

should be increased to encourage

people

Use synonyms

to consume less

sugar

Use synonyms

. I disagree with

this

Linking Words

view, as putting up the price of sugary commodities can not address the problem fundamentally.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the governments are responsible

to raise

Change preposition

for raising

show examples

people

Use synonyms

’s awareness of the

hazard

Fix the agreement mistake

hazards

show examples

of excessive

sugar

Use synonyms

consumption, and they are supposed to provide free education.

For instance

Linking Words

, it is necessary

that

Change preposition

show examples

reporting

Wrong verb form

report

show examples

on health education in the community every month, which can help

people

Use synonyms

learn

health relative

Use the right word

health-related

show examples

knowledge.

In addition

Linking Words

, the authority can offer free medical consultation in the community and school, as it can deal with the issues

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

facing

Wrong verb form

face

show examples

from

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reality.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the government should supervise that the

sugar

Use synonyms

content in the food produced by companies

should be

Wrong verb form

show examples

within a reasonable range. Through these ways,

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

are able to

aware

Verb problem

be aware

show examples

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

significance of reducing

sugar

Use synonyms

intake.

Besides

Linking Words

, in terms of individuality,

people

Use synonyms

should

make

Verb problem

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

try to change their dietary habits.

Change preposition

With

show examples

the development of society, the level of

people

Use synonyms

’s living has been improved

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

there are multifarious foods to taste,

while

Linking Words

some of those are unhealthy,

such

Linking Words

as high

sugar

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

should attach

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

importance

Change preposition

show examples

low-

Correct article usage

a low-sugar

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

diet and eat less high-

sugar

Use synonyms

products

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

breads

Fix the agreement mistake

bread

show examples

, desserts, cakes and so on. Admittedly, more expensive

sugar

Use synonyms

products

Use synonyms

may contribute to

consume

Wrong verb form

consuming

show examples

less

sugar

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, no matter how expensive they are,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

still are

Correct word order

are still

show examples

likely to purchase them, so it is not a fundamental way to solve

this

Linking Words

issue. In conclusion, the government should assume its responsibility to explain the significance of a low-

sugar

Use synonyms

diet. Meanwhile, the

people

Use synonyms

themselves are supposed to change

the

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

lifestyle of consuming high-

sugar

Use synonyms

habits.

chunyanh502

Jun 30, 2025

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improvement

Your view is clear, but link your ideas more to the prompt. Start with a clear main sentence in the first para and use a main idea in each paragraph.

improvement

Work on how you move from one idea to the next. Use simple linking words and show how each point connects to your claim.

improvement

Give specific and simple examples that back up each point and relate them to sugar use.

strength

You state your view at the start, which helps show the task focus.

strength

You give both steps for government and for people, showing balance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that children should be taught at school to recycle material and avoid waste. Other believe that should be taught at home. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There is a trend in the 21 century in which people are turning to alternative healing like Ayurveda and homeopathy over allopathic medicine. Discuss the Advantages and disadvantages of this approach.

If a product is good and meets customer needs, then people will buy it and advertising is unnecessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)