Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, many

food

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and drink

products

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contain too much

sugar

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This

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is bad for

people

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's health because it can cause problems like obesity and diabetes. Some

people

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think sugary

products

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should cost more money to make

people

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buy less

sugar

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. I agree with

this

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idea, but I

also

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think there are some problems with it.

First,

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if sugary

products

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become more expensive,

people

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will probably buy less of them.

For example

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, in some countries, the government made sugary drinks more expensive

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

people

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bought fewer of them.

This

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is good because when

people

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eat less

sugar

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, they will be healthier.

Also

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, parents might buy fewer sweets for their children if the price goes up.

Second,

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many

people

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don't know how much

sugar

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is bad for them. If prices go up, they might think more carefully before buying sugary things.

This

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could help them make better choices about what they eat and drink. The extra money from higher prices could

also

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be used to teach

people

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about healthy eating.

However

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, there are some problems with making sugary

products

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more expensive. Poor

people

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might find it difficult because they often buy cheap

food

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, which is usually unhealthy. If healthy

food

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doesn't become cheaper at the same time,

this

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might not be fair.

Also

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, some

people

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might still buy sugary

products

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even if they cost more because they like them too much. In conclusion, I think making sugary

products

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more expensive is a good idea because it can help

people

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be healthier. But the government should

also

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make healthy

food

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cheaper and teach

people

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about good eating habits.

This

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way, everyone can have a better chance to eat well.

chunyanh502

Jun 30, 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to develop your ideas more fully with clear examples. For instance, explain how education about health can help people make better choices.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words to connect your ideas better. This will help your essay flow more smoothly.

task achievement

Try to provide a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more clearly.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and examples that directly support that idea.

structure

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

276 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some cultures, children are often told that thy can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people fail in school, but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is, in your opinion, the most important thing to succeed in life?

22. Many student choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Do you think this is a good idea or a waste of time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The most important aim of science should be improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools.