IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Illiteracy continue to be a concern for many countries in the world today. What are the causes of illiteracy in the modern world and what effects does it have on the people concerned and on society as a whole ?

Illiteracy is one of the most crucial issues whole around the world. So one which can have negative effects on the future of society. There seem to be two main reasons and a number of impacts, which we will discuss here. Possibly the main cause is getting common of social media for all people
especially
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, especially
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 among adolescents and teenagers.
Through
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By
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 sitting
social
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on social
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 media for
long
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a long
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 time, young generations will waste their valuable time, which can be exacerbated by
disturbance
Correct article usage
a disturbance
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 of sleep. After sleepless nights they are unable to focus on assignments like
readingsa
Correct your spelling
reading
 and
writings
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writing
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 in school and blue-collar jobs. A
further
Linking Words
 well-known cause is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
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 of pay attention by parents for generations' edu and their social circle who influence on teenagers upbringing. Long work hours and exhaustion are the reason why parents cannot give enough attention to their children. Ignoring generations' upbringing impacts on
uncare
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the uncare
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 of
edu
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education
 and literacy by youth. The effects of
this
Linking Words
 problem on people can be quite serious.
Firstly
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, widespread illiteracy is experienced because of the difficulty in
concentrate
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concentrating
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 on education.
This
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 can be especially damaging
for
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to
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 society's future. A
further
Linking Words
 widely-observed impact is
increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
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of
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apply
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crime degree, which can be seen in any country.
For example
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, there
are
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has been
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twenty-fold
Correct article usage
a twenty-fold
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 rise in
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the USA
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USA
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USA's
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 crime rate among teenagers in the
last
Linking Words
 century, which
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
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 from
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of morality. In terms of
this
Linking Words
 case will result in neglected upbringings. In conclusion,
popularize
Correct article usage
the popularize
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 of social media and insufficient of pay attention to
children
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children's
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 education seem to be
main
Correct article usage
the main
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 causes and they affect both society's future and offence
grow
Verb problem
apply
show examples
.

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coherence and cohesion
Reorganize the points to have a clearer structure. Start with the causes before discussing the effects.
task achievement
Provide more clear examples to support each point made in the paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check your grammar and spelling to improve clarity. For example, "getting common" should be "becoming common" and "writingsa" should be "writing".
task achievement
You have addressed the topic and presented causes and effects.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion indicating the main focus.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Literacy
  • Illiteracy
  • Poverty
  • Access
  • Educational resources
  • Social inequality
  • Discrimination
  • Gender disparity
  • Racial bias
  • Cultural norms
  • Technological advances
  • Political instability
  • Disruption
  • Education systems
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Job prospects
  • Health implications
  • Self-esteem
  • Empowerment
  • Economic growth
  • Social cohesion
  • Civic participation
  • Democratic processes
  • Exclusion
What to do next:
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