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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The pie charts below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The tables shows how these causes affected three regions of world during the 1990s.

The pie charts below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The tables shows how these causes affected three regions of world during the 1990s.
The pie chart illustrates the main factors contributing to the decline in the productivity of agricultural
land
Use synonyms
 worldwide,
while
Linking Words
 the table compares the impact of these causes on North America, Europe, and Oceania during the 1990s.
Overall
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, over-grazing was the leading cause of global
land
Use synonyms
 degradation,
whereas
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 other factors played a comparatively minor role. Among the three regions, Europe experienced the highest percentage of degraded
land
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 North America was the least affected.
According to
Linking Words
 the pie chart, over-grazing accounted for 35% of total
land
Use synonyms
 degradation globally, making it the most significant factor.
This
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 was followed closely by deforestation and
over-cultivation
Use synonyms
, which were responsible for 30% and 28%, respectively. Other causes contributed only 7%, making them the least impactful
overall
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. The table shows that Europe had the highest proportion of degraded
land
Use synonyms
, at 23%. Within
this
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 figure, deforestation and
over-cultivation
Use synonyms
 were the main contributors, at 9.8% and 7.7%, respectively. Oceania ranked second with 13% of its
land
Use synonyms
 affected, largely
due to
Linking Words
 over-grazing (11.3%). Unlike the other regions, Oceania had no
land
Use synonyms
 affected by
over-cultivation
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
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, only 5% of North America’s
land
Use synonyms
 was degraded, with
over-cultivation
Use synonyms
 (3.3%) as the primary cause.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words land, over-cultivation with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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