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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The tables shows how these causes affected three regions of world during the 1990s.

The pie charts below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The tables shows how these causes affected three regions of world during the 1990s.
The pie chart illustrates the causes why farming soil is lower in the field of production and the table states how
land
Use synonyms
degradation
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 reasons influenced three parts of the world during the 1990s.
Overall
Linking Words
, over-grazing contributes the highest and other causes are the lowest in contribution to global
land
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degradation
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the 1990s table, Europe has the highest percentage of total soil
degradation
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 whilst, North America shows the lowest percentage. In the pie chart, The primary cause of
land
Use synonyms
degradation
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 globally is over-grazing worldwide with 35%. Deforestation and over-cultivation contribute 30% and 28% in the world respectively and other causes have the lower percentage with 7% in the world
land
Use synonyms
degradation
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. In the 1990s, Oceania contributed no
land
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degradation
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 in over-cultivation and
also
Linking Words
 had the highest share with 11.3% in over-grazing. In total contribution, Europe holds a 23% share of the main soil
degradation
Use synonyms
 reason and North America holds a 5% share among the three countries.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words land, degradation with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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