It is inevitable that as technology develops, cultures must be lost. Technology and traditions are incompatible - you cannot have both together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

t
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It
is inevitable that as
technology
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develops, cultures must be lost.
Technology
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and
traditions
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are incompatible – you cannot have both together. To what extent do you agree or disagree? In the modern era,
technology
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is developing rapidly and affecting almost every aspect of our lives. Some
people
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believe that the growth of
technology
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leads to the disappearance of traditional cultures, and that
both
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they
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cannot exist together.
While
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I agree that technological progress can influence cultural values, I disagree with the idea that
traditions
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and
technology
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are completely incompatible. On the one hand, it is true that technological development can negatively impact traditional customs.
For example
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, young
people
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today are more likely to spend their time on smartphones and social media rather than participating in cultural festivals or learning traditional music and crafts.
As a result
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, many old customs are becoming less popular or even forgotten.
Also
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, the global spread of Western
technology
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and entertainment can sometimes lead to a loss of local identity, as
people
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adopt foreign habits and lifestyles.
On the other hand
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,
technology
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can
also
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help preserve and promote culture. Nowadays, digital platforms
such
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as YouTube and social media allow
people
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to share their
traditions
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, languages, and art with a wider audience.
For example
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, many traditional dances or recipes are now available online, which helps younger generations learn and respect their heritage.
In addition
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,
technology
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can help document endangered languages and customs for future study. In conclusion,
while
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it is true that
technology
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can cause changes in traditional lifestyles, it does not always lead to cultural loss. In fact, when used correctly, it can help to protect and share
traditions
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.
Therefore
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, I believe that
technology
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and tradition can exist side by side.

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task achievement
Try to provide more examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use transition words to connect your ideas more clearly. This will help with the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion, which is very important.
coherence and cohesion
You have a good conclusion that summarizes your points well.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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