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Writing Samples
Band 5

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, there has been a rise in the popularity of e-learning.
While
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 some think that online
education
Use synonyms
 has many advantages that will soon substitute standard teaching methods, many people,
however
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, argue that it is impossible to replace conventional
education
Use synonyms
. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss not only why remote learning will take over
in person
Use the right word
in-person
show examples
classes
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 but
also
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 why traditional teaching methods are irreplaceable
,
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apply
show examples
 and why I support the latter. There are those who believe that e-learning has many benefits, and it will soon take over standard
education
Use synonyms
. As it is convenient for
students
Use synonyms
 to attend
classes
Use synonyms
 remotely, they can have time to work or do other activities
such
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 as exercising and spending time with their family. Many universities in Australia,
for instance
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, provide options for undergraduates to do their learning modules online, so they can continue their studies and not give up other plans. If they were not given
this
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 opportunity to study online, they would rather choose to get a job and skip
classes
Use synonyms
. Remote learning is beneficial for
students
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
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, face-to-face
education
Use synonyms
 is still needed eventually. When it comes to traditional face-to-face
education
Use synonyms
, others, including myself, think
that
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is
Correct pronoun usage
it is
show examples
 far more significant and impossible to be replaced any time soon.
This
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 is simply because certain learning content requires real-life simulation and training
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is hard and unsuccessful for
students
Use synonyms
 to master online.
Nursing
Correct article usage
A nursing
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 course,
for example
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, needs some actual skills and practices as it requires
the
Correct article usage
a
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 real-world scenario to be efficient. Resulting in nursing
students
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 being prepared and ready for their clinical placements.
In other words
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, it makes sense to prioritise conventional teaching methods. In conclusion, e-learning is indeed convenient for learners to continue their studies,
while
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 traditional schooling is fundamental to guarantee quality
education
Use synonyms
 in many fields. In my opinion, despite the advantages of online
education
Use synonyms
, I believe that in-person
classes
Use synonyms
 have more positive impacts for learners
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 are unparalleled somehow.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has clear main ideas and details that support those ideas. Sometimes, the connection between ideas can be clearer.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples, especially for your points in favor of traditional education.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas better. This will help the flow of your essay.
task achievement
You clearly state your opinion and discuss both views, which is a good approach for this type of essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, making it easy to understand your main message.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-Learning
  • face-to-face education
  • remote learning
  • virtual classroom
  • webinar
  • digital platform
  • self-paced learning
  • interactive learning
  • course accessibility
  • academic networking
  • pedagogy
  • synchronous/asynchronous sessions
  • MOOCs (Massive Open Online Courses)
  • edtech (educational technology)
  • holistic development
  • practical skills
  • collaborative learning
  • digital divide
  • curriculum adaptation
  • technological literacy
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