IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that goverments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is believed that all of us should have access to
education
Use synonyms
 for college
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the
government
Use synonyms
 should
cater
Verb problem
cover
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 all the expenses for it
no
Punctuation problem
, no
show examples
 matter if the student is financially capable or not. I totally agree
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
Linking Words
.
Education
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 is a
priviledge
Correct your spelling
privilege
 not
everyone
Use synonyms
 has.
While
Linking Words
 it is true that if you want it, you should find a way to have it, some people just do not have the time to put in so much effort for their
education
Use synonyms
 because they are too busy surviving their
day to day
Use the right word
day-to-day
show examples
 life. In
this
Linking Words
 case, the
government
Use synonyms
 should take part
it
Use the right word
in
show examples
 providing free
education
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 accessible for
everyone
Use synonyms
. As someone from a humble background, I have experienced the challenges that
comes
Correct subject-verb agreement
come
show examples
 in going to college without having the means to pay for it. Most of the
students
Use synonyms
 take part-time jobs
inorder
Use the right word
in order
show examples
 to have the money to pay for their tuition and
miscellenious
Correct your spelling
miscellaneous
 fees.
This
Linking Words
does
Verb problem
apply
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not only
drain
Correct subject-verb agreement
drains
show examples
 the
students
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 physically
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 it can
also
Linking Words
 affect their performance in school.
Instead
Linking Words
 of giving their best on their exams and assignments, they are working to make ends meet.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 undeniable that there are
students
Use synonyms
 who waste their chance and take for granted the
priviledge
Correct your spelling
privilege
 given to them. In
this
Linking Words
 case, a policy wherein they need to maintain a passing rate or grade should be applied. By doing
this
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 can guarantee that the
students
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 are not wasting the chance that was given to them.
Furtheremore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, the benefits of having educated citizens can be an advantage for the
government
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.
This
Linking Words
 will create a well-educated manpower that can help in improving the country's economy. It will be a win-win situation for
everyone
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
education
Use synonyms
 should not be a heavy weight that people carry on their shoulders. It is a tool that will help people
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
achieve their goals and dreams in life. With
this
Linking Words
 being said, I totally agree that it would really be a great help if the
government
Use synonyms
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 give
everyone
Use synonyms
 the chance to be educated
no
Punctuation problem
, no
show examples
 matter how financially capable they are.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check spelling and grammar. For example, 'priviledge' should be 'privilege', and 'inorder' should be 'in order'.
task achievement
Try to include more examples to support your arguments. For instance, you can talk about how free education has helped other countries.
coherence and cohesion
Add clearer connections between your paragraphs. This will help the reader understand how your ideas link together.
task achievement
You express a strong opinion, which is important in this kind of essay.
task achievement
You present personal experiences, which makes your argument more relatable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Equitable access
  • Socio-economic status
  • Economic growth
  • Skilled workforce
  • Student debt
  • Social mobility
  • Cycle of poverty
  • Financial burdens
  • Education quality
  • Public services
What to do next:
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