IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer

In today's fast-paced world, people have different opinions about where to eat. Some people enjoy going to restaurants or
food
Use synonyms
 stalls,
while
Linking Words
 others like to eat at
home
Use synonyms
. Personally, I prefer to prepare and eat
food
Use synonyms
 at
home
Use synonyms
 rather than outside. I have several reasons for
this
Linking Words
 choice. First of all,
home
Use synonyms
-cooked
food
Use synonyms
 is healthier. People can choose fresh ingredients, avoid too much oil, salt and sugar, which are harmful to health.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, preservatives and unhealthy fats are used in restaurants or outside
food
Use synonyms
 stalls. Obesity, high blood pressure, and heart failure are some serious problems
occur
Correct pronoun usage
that occur
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 these harmful elements.
Secondly
Linking Words
, eating at
home
Use synonyms
 saves money.
Buy
Wrong verb form
Buying
show examples
 groceries and
cook
Wrong verb form
cooking
show examples
 at
home
Use synonyms
 can reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food
Use synonyms
 costs. Apart from that, eating at restaurants costs too much money.
For instance
Linking Words
, a meal at a restaurant is two or three times
expensive
Rephrase
as expensive
show examples
than
Change preposition
as
show examples
 a meal made at
home
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, cooking at
home
Use synonyms
 can create a strong bond among family members. When all family members sit at the table to eat together, they experience a different feeling. It helps to enhance emotions and attractions towards the family.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea.
coherence and cohesion
It would be good to add a conclusion that summarizes your main points.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
You have clearly stated your preference for home cooking.
task achievement
Your reasons are relevant and well-explained.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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