IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

More and more people nowadays visit well-known places to take photographs of themselves, without looking at the place. Why do you think this is happening? Is it a positive or a negative trend?

In my opinion,
such
Linking Words
 things are happening because people are focused on approval trends on social media and It goes without saying that there ressources social media influence on the target audience by different means depending on their
cultural
Punctuation problem
cultural,
show examples
 intellectual
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 educational levels. I believe it is
trend a
Correct word order
a trend
show examples
 negative because tourists
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, Instead
show examples
Instead
Fix capitalization
instead
show examples
 of enjoying the sights they are
practicing
Use the right word
practising
show examples
self- admiration
Use the right word
self-admiration
show examples
 Frankly speaking, it is annoying a lot of visitors
Linking Words
For
Punctuation problem
. For
show examples
 example, yesterday when I went to a music people behaved
Strangely
Fix capitalization
strangely
show examples
 and took pictures of themselves in the
minor
Use the right word
mirror
show examples
 to follow a dull Instagram trend. They were not interested in the songs and music
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 their main goal was to posture for fame. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 a person's
behavior
Use the right word
behaviour
show examples
 is based on circumstances.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to fully explain your ideas in more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer and more organized paragraphs to show your ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
content
You recognized the influence of social media on behavior.
content
Your conclusion indicated awareness of behavior based on circumstances.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Visual content
  • Landmarks
  • Likes and followers
  • Selfie
  • Trophy
  • Validation
  • Accomplishment
  • Technological advancements
  • Smartphone cameras
  • Photography-focused tourism
  • Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
  • Immersing
  • Local economy
  • Cultural significance
  • Backdrops
  • Photographic evidence
  • Overcrowding
  • Wear and tear
What to do next:
Look at other essays: