IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Carn ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty year that many cities in the world are now “one big traffic jam” How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

Over the past three decades,
car
Use synonyms
 ownership has surged dramatically, leading many urban areas to suffer from chronic congestion. In some
cities
Use synonyms
, the situation has become so severe that it is not an exaggeration to describe them as “one big traffic jam.”
This
Linking Words
 statement holds true, particularly in large metropolitan regions
such
Linking Words
 as Jakarta, Cairo, and Los Angeles, where roads are constantly clogged with vehicles. The rapid increase in
car
Use synonyms
 ownership is often driven by rising incomes, poor public transportation, and a cultural preference for private vehicles.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many
cities
Use synonyms
 were not designed to accommodate
such
Linking Words
 a high volume of cars, resulting in severe bottlenecks, increased pollution, and reduced quality of life. To combat
this
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 issue, governments must implement a range of strategies to discourage
car
Use synonyms
 use. One effective approach is introducing congestion charges, which require drivers to pay fees for entering city centres during peak hours.
Cities
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 like London and Singapore have successfully reduced traffic using
this
Linking Words
 method.
Additionally
Linking Words
, increasing parking costs and limiting parking spaces can make driving less convenient. Another key measure is improving public transportation systems. If people have access to reliable, affordable, and safe alternatives, they are more likely to leave their cars at home. Promoting cycling and walking through the development of bike lanes and pedestrian zones can
also
Linking Words
 help reduce dependency on cars. In conclusion, the rise in
car
Use synonyms
 ownership has indeed turned many
cities
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 into congested areas. Governments must act decisively by both discouraging
car
Use synonyms
 use and investing in sustainable, accessible alternatives.

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task achievement
Add more details to support your reasons, especially for the measures that governments can take.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to show clearer connections between your ideas, for example, use 'firstly', 'next', and 'finally'.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Your ideas about using congestion charges and improving public transport are well presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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