Some people believe that the internet has brought people together, while others think it has made them more isolated

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT

Use synonyms

INTERNET

Correct article usage

THE INTERNET

show examples

? IN

THIS

Linking Words

ESSAY

Punctuation problem

ESSAY,

show examples

I WILL WRITE ABOUT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WHO BELIEVE THAT THE

INTERNET

Use synonyms

HAS BROUGHT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

CLOSER WITH EACH OTHER.

ON THE OTHER HAND

Linking Words

, SOME

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WHO THINK THAT IT HAS MADE THEM MORE ISOLATED.

THERE ARE MANY TYPE OF

Use the right word

There are many types of people

show examples

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WHO BELIEVE THAT THE

INTERNET

Use synonyms

HAS BROUGHT

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

MORE CLOSER TOGETHER

Rephrase

closer together

show examples

IN ADDITION

Linking Words

Use synonyms

INTERNET

Correct article usage

the INTERNET

show examples

WILL

LET

Verb problem

make

show examples

THE COMMUNICATION

Correct determiner usage

communication

show examples

STRONGER.

ALSO

Linking Words

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

CAN CONTACT

WITH

Change preposition

apply

show examples

EACH OTHER EASILY.

MOREOVER

Linking Words

, IT HELPS

PERSON

Fix the agreement mistake

PEOPLE

show examples

GETTING NEWS ABOUT FRIENDS.

IN ADDITION

Linking Words

, STUDENTS WHO

STUDYING ABROAD

Wrong verb form

study abroad

show examples

WILL CONTACT

WITH THEIR

Change preposition

their

show examples

FAMILY

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

Change preposition

via

show examples

Use synonyms

INTERNET

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

. SO, I SEE THAT THE

INTERNET

Use synonyms

IS ESSENTIAL

Change preposition

apply

show examples

NOWADAYS.

ON THE OTHER HAND

Linking Words

, OTHER

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

THINK IT HAS MADE THEM MORE ISOLATED.

IN ADDITION

Linking Words

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WHO

Verb problem

are OBSSESED

show examples

OBSSESED WITH

Correct your spelling

obsessed with

Correct article usage

the INTRENET

show examples

INTRENET WILL

Correct your spelling

Internet will

INTROVERT PERSONS

Check wording

introverted persons

show examples

ALSO

Linking Words

, THEY MAY FEEL BAD AND SO MUCH

ENGERY

Correct your spelling

ENERGY

. AND

PEOPLE

Use synonyms

WOULD HAVE

GET

Wrong verb form

GOT

show examples

A LOT OF DETRIMENT. LIKE EYES HURTING

Punctuation problem

, IT

show examples

WILL

CAUSED

Wrong verb form

CAUSE

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

WEARING EYEGLASSES. SO, SOMETIMES THE

INTERNET

Use synonyms

WILL BE

UNUSEFUL

Replace the word

USEFUL

show examples

TO SUM UP

Linking Words

, WE SHOULD RESPECT ALL

Use synonyms

PEOPLE

Check wording

PEOPLE'S

show examples

OPINIONS.

AS A RESULT

Linking Words

, WE WILL GET A STRONG

SOCEITY

Correct your spelling

SOCIETY

amthal.2008

Jul 13, 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to have clear paragraphs for each point. Separate ideas can help the reader understand better.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words like 'first,' 'next,' and 'finally' to show the order of your ideas. This helps the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Add more examples to support your points. Specific examples can make your argument stronger.

task achievement

Try to avoid repeating phrases. Use different words to express the same idea.

task achievement

You have a clear introduction that shows the topic of the essay.

task achievement

You address both sides of the argument, which is good for balanced discussions.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

181 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

E-commerce
Consumer behavior
Virtual marketplace
Cybersecurity
Digital footprint
Return policy
Comparison shopping
Customer reviews
Retail therapy
Logistics
User interface
Payment gateway

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Some people believe that the internet has brought people together, while others think it has made them more isolated

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that schools are too competitive and that this has a negative impact on children. Others believe the competitive environment encourages children to achieve. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Environmental damage is a problem in most countries. What is the cause of this damage? What should be done about this problem?

Education in prison is the best way to reduce crime as prisoners will be able to get job after leaving the prison. Do you agree or disagree