IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore they should be encouraged to watch television both at home and at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‏There is no denying the fact that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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television
Use synonyms
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern technology
changed
Verb problem
have changed
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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children
Check wording
children's
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
While
Linking Words
 some people firmly believe that they should use the
television
Use synonyms
 in both
house
Correct article usage
the house
show examples
 and school, I strongly disagree because of the negative
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
 that could happen.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the reasons why I hold
this
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 opinion. ‏One main reason is that they can take the information from
unofficial
Correct article usage
an unofficial
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 program.
In other
Linking Words
words
Add a comma
words,
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 they can take wrong information from
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 shows. If they watch
this
Linking Words
 without guidance from their parents and teachers,
this
Linking Words
 will
effect
Use the right word
affect
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 score and progress.
Therefore
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, we should raise
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awareness of the negative impact
from
Change preposition
of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
television
Use synonyms
 . ‏Another reason that they can watch things that
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 not related to their studies
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as cartoons. What I mean
that
Verb problem
is that
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 they can spend
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 shows and they will waste their time .
For example
Linking Words
, if parents and teachers do not take care of what children watch, they will waste
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 time
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 shows. ‏In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 they can use
television
Use synonyms
 in
effective
Correct article usage
an effective
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 way. I disagree
because of
Change preposition
for
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 the reasons
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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outlined above.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion. Your opinion is present, but it can be more direct and clear.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the flow of your ideas. Use linking words to connect your thoughts more smoothly.
task achievement
Use specific examples or studies to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion on the topic and express it in your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay structure includes an introduction, body, and conclusion.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • passive
  • sedentary
  • limit
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • educational content
  • expose
  • different cultures
  • perspectives
  • negative effects
  • behavior
What to do next:
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