IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

he chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018.

he chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018.
The bar graph illustrates details on how families of a country spent their weekly earnings for various reasons in two different years
1968
Punctuation problem
, 1968
show examples
 and 2018. The data is presented in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest amount of money was spent in 1968 for food and in 2018 for leisure and housing.
However
Linking Words
, around 5 and 3
Use synonyms
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
 in the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1968 and
2018
Punctuation problem
2018,
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respectively
Punctuation problem
respectively,
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 are the lowest amounts which were spent in both years
for
Change preposition
on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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fuel and power. Noticeably, a major drop
observed
Verb problem
was observed
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 over the years
approximately
Punctuation problem
, approximately
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 16
Use synonyms
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
 for the food. Meanwhile, there is no
such
Linking Words
 variation
seems
Verb problem
apply
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in spending for household goods during
Correct article usage
the mention
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mention
Replace the word
mentioned
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 time.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, for transportation services and housing
residents
Punctuation problem
, residents
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 used to spend less than 10 and 12
Use synonyms
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
increased by slightly less than 15 and 20
Use synonyms
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
. Surprisingly, for clothing and footwear
people
Punctuation problem
, people
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 decreased their spending by exactly 5
Use synonyms
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
 in 2018 from 1968.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Weekly income
  • Expenditure
  • Consumption patterns
  • Cost of living
  • Discretionary spending
  • Inflation
  • Economic indicators
  • Demographics
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Technology advancements
  • Government policies
  • Consumerism
  • Lifestyle changes
  • Fiscal habits
  • Budget allocation
  • Financial priorities
  • Societal trends
  • Purchasing power
  • Income distribution
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